In my post, I asked an awkward question: “To UBF loyalists, can the good you experienced in UBF not hold you back from clearly addressing, confronting and condemning what is bad and ugly about UBF?”

Chris, your response seems to say that perhaps some cannot simply stop the bad/ugly “spiritual abuses.” I won’t go so far as to say that they are not born again. But I would say that longstanding cultural Confucian influences hinder it from being urgently addressed. It totally violates the “junzi gentlemen ideal” and the other Confucian words mentioned in Brian’s article on Confucius.

It is messy, it exposes weaknesses and shame, it creates vulnerability, and it challenges those who want to safe face, etc. Even after 50 years, it apparently can’t be clearly confronted and dealt with.

UBF missionaries have clearly done many many good things. But the good things they have done cannot negate, cancel or balance the bad/ugly things that were done.

I believe that when the senior UBF leadership accepts this basic biblical truth, we will begin to make some progress. Until then, some UBF leaders will keep making excuses, justify the bad/ugly, misquote the Bible and take Bible verses out of context, simply to insist that UBF is good and that UBF’s good exceeds and excuses her bad/ugly.

“For whoever keeps the whole law and yet stumbles at just one point is guilty of breaking all of it.”

That’s right, MJ. Even in the world, it doesn’t work that way. But in the spiritual world, it doesn’t work at all. Pauls makes it so clear when he wrote “A little leaven leavens the whole lump of dough.”

Christian theology is all about admitting you’re wrong, ‘fessing up. Being honest, living in the light. Let’s shed some light on the state our church and theology is. Like it’s been said before, there’s gangrene and if it’s not removed it’ll destroy everything.

simply a way to get bigger share of pie by reducing members

better to be true friends than have false connections

“It is great to hear from you after all this time. I too had thought of contacting you many a time, but was afraid to do so. I was afraid that you may of been upset at my leaving UBF.”

Had he been aware that I valued his friendship he would not have been afraid at my reaction, but it is clear that once he left UBF that meant he lost all of his friends too! About me, this is not true.

“I would of loved to be at your wedding, however I probably wouldn’t of come if you had invited me given that I’m not on the best of terms with some UBF members (nothing ruins a wedding like a heated argument).”

Please note, I could not invite many extra people to my wedding because of space limitation – in his case, I didn’t because we had been out of contact for a long time.

those doggone Pharisees just kept pulling Woes out of poor Jesus mouth..

Right, Mark. We could go on and on.

Those who are still talking about the Holocaust are just bitter.

Paul was just bitter in 1 Cor 5 and 2 Cor 11:19-21 and Gal 2:14. Even Jesus was bitter in Jn 2:15 and Rev 2:14.

kids were not abused by priests/covered up by bishops, the kids were just bitter..

women are not raped, their just bitter..

the world & religion gotta learn a lesson: the problem bigger than the transgression is the coverup which continues it

This quote from the article you referenced is revolting. I don’t find the “greatbiblestudy.com” great at all!

Original article text:

“Some outside observers and former members describe the group as cult-like and/or “abusive.”

The Washington D.C. person tried to anonymously make it:

“Many former bible students view this ministry as effective in their life, and although a tough lifestyle, an overall benefiting one.”

Glad the Wikipedians don’t allow this kind of drive-by crap.

It is so important for us to keep speaking up, even if we become bitter from time to time or even if we re-cycle some of the same stories. We must raise our voices. If not, then ubfers will just re-write history and blot us out.

Any ubf missionary who claims such a thing as you say Ben is just playing the “alligator tears” card. Yet another card in the deck of deceit used by most ubf missionaries.

If I may ask, are not some UBF missionaries “bitter” because those sheep whom they loved and served for decades just upped and left without any clear articulation to them as to how grateful, indebted and thankful they were for being so loved and served?

BUT WE CANNOT LORD AUTHORITY OVER ANOTHER HUMAN BEING! Demons do not enter people through their emotions but through their pride, arrogance and lust for power, glory and authority.

I think bitterness is allowed at times, as in Job 7:11 or Job 10:1. Proverbs and Psalms speaks many times of expressing bitterness, so I think it is healhty from time to time, as in Proverbs 14:10, Psalms 71:20 among others. The bible speaks to accepting that bitterness is a human emotion that does exist.

Why can’t ubf people just live in reality? Bitter is bitter. Sin is sin. Anger is anger. Joy is joy. Love is love. Just live your life and be yourself.

“People who have a root of bitterness find it easy to get upset over things that other’s are doing around them. It is easy for them to look at the circumstances around them as the source of their problems, rather than seeing how they are handling those circumstances. Instead of letting it go and forgiving, they let it get to them, and it devours them alive. This is a very common route by which demons enter people today.”

I do welcome correction and rebuke for any comments of mine that suggests bitterness in my heart, which I may not be able to see or perceive, or which may be my own glaring blind spot.

Some UBF leaders think that the UBF standard is a “high standard,” not realizing how pathetic and pitiful it is compared to the gospel.

“How can we explain both the exhilarating highs of UBF (the good) and the downright depressing discouraging lows (the bad/ugly)?”

I don’t think I am wrong to say that all of the former members on UBFriends had excellent experiences in the beginning. However, I believe it is the departure that has more presence in a memory. I think this is likely because almost every testimony ever written in UBF had to give praise someway and somehow to UBF, its shepherds and absolutely the Korean missionaries. As a result, once someone leaves there is a lot of pent up emotion based on experiences and observations and relationships. Consequently, when someone shares after they have left it is difficult to want to state the good things, because it has been done so many times before, but nobody ever allowed you to share the bad things.

“To those hurt by UBF, can the good you experienced in UBF curb the bad you experienced? To UBF loyalists, can the good you experienced in UBF not hold you back from clearly addressing, confronting and condemning what is bad and ugly about UBF?”

For me, when I entered UBF I also felt that people were very sincere, and I still do. In my case the experience and opportunity led me from an agnostic life to a full-meaning and deep relationship with God. My family has a rich combination of faiths, but by my generation my parents never took a stand. Faith was neither encouraged, nor dicouraged. When I was invited to Bible study my shepherd did not coldly just invite me. Something gave him better wisdom – he just simply sat down and had a friendly conversation with me. Now, some may critique and say that’s strategy – of course it is! – but it was a wise one, because I would otherwise have told him to stick it. It took time to be reliable (faithful). At first I only attended Bible studies and Sunday’s. Soon came a two day crammed conference – which despite what we have said about the upcoming one, was the turning point for me. In this, I really did feel a special spirit present – not evil spirit. As Ben said, it was like a “supernatural presence.” At this time I really did experience God’s grace in my life. I do not regret the involvement that I have had in UBF to this day. I regret situations and reactions that have occurred over the course of time. Abuses are the result of not measuring up to – the UBF standard!

Can I be considered a loyalist? I would say no, but maybe I am wrong.
Can the beginning curb my bad experience? No. The trouble is, even though there was so much benefit through the Bible studies and environment there developed serious issues for me personally (rebukes/disagreements aside).

I would say that three aspects that bother(ed) me are:

1) A primary focus on increasing numbers when some members may not yet have a relationship with God and/or be young in faith

When a person comes to study the Bible or attend a church it does not mean that person can effectively share the gospel. (This does not dismiss those who are able.) I take issue with this in UBF because no one allows a relationship with God to take root – instead they say go by faith. What is faith if you have no relationship with God? The imperative is to get out and invite people – increase the numbers: record your weekly invitation and actual studies. People do not often do this out of God’s grace, but out of duty. In fact some people are told what their goals are.

2) Determining when a growing leader is actually part of the church – big or small

This begets a big problem: that person has given up friends, family, personal interests, time, money, effort, attention etc….to be a part of the church community. Soon they realize that nothing matters because they did not fulfill some expected goals imposed on them not by God, but by a group people caught up in the system. If emphasis was placed on the growing relationship with God I believe the Holy Spirit would use those people to serve and honour God. Willingness and desire can be swayed by the church environment. The fact is that UBF obligates people to carry out works and then after many hard, long years MAYBE embraces them into the church leadership and community.

3) The constant re-evaluation of Self vs. God

One of my professors (who was evangelical) expressed this problem a good way, “In evangelical churches you frequently get ‘the talk.’” For evangelicals, he compared the relationship one has with God to a couple that is not yet married. In UBF you are frequently accounting for each minute as a means to define where you are in your relationship with God. If you are not doing ministry work such as fishing, daily bread, testimony writing, early morning prayer, attending meetings, attending conferences…..you DO NOT have a good relationship with God. You have a bad or broken relationship with God. When the community is an audience for testimony sharing you are measured according to what has been written in your testimonies. You are not, however, measured by your actual real life situation and circumstances – so you either dress up the testimony to your audience or you bury yourself in condemnation because you cannot measure up as a shepherd. May I mention that any communal prayer can actually be done at home or in a quiet place any time of the day – it does not have to be seen by the congregation to determine that you are actually praying to God.

“I think it’s easier for some to say we are bashing when we openly discuss the real issues of spiritual abuse. Some refuse to acknowledge that spiritual abuse has even taken place. They argue it was in the best interest of the sheep/bible student. The abuse runs deep. Therefore respect and trust are gone. The abuse is still occurring and not being dealt with or acknowledged.

When people are involved sin is involved. I can’t say the good outweighs the bad. I think there is good within people of UBF, how is it good when people allow the spiritual abuse. Some say well I didn’t say anything, it didn’t happen, or it didn’t happen to me, it was in your best interest?

Spiritual abuse is still running rampant. Yes I pray, yes I have forgiven, yes I’m Christian and was Christian before going to UBF. Their are some who have never even said Hi or taken time to get to know me. Yet had time to judge me.

I believe God has blessed people within UBF. I have made friends within UBF.”

I was probably a UBF loyalist for over 2 decades, until I felt that it affected my own relationship with God, and with others. In my opinion, UBF loyalists sometimes places UBF interests ahead of Christ’s interest; they seem more concerned about protecting UBF than about preserving the gospel.

Your question about children finding Christ (instead of religion) will require a new post with elaborate explanation.