Comments on: Missionary Empathy- 4 things I learned in the Philippines http://www.ubfriends.org/2015/01/13/missionary-empathy-5-things-i-learned-in-the-philippines/ for friends of University Bible Fellowship Wed, 21 Oct 2015 04:34:18 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=4.3.1 By: Libby http://www.ubfriends.org/2015/01/13/missionary-empathy-5-things-i-learned-in-the-philippines/#comment-16270 Thu, 22 Jan 2015 20:13:32 +0000 http://www.ubfriends.org/?p=8775#comment-16270 hey forest, indeed i had the chance, by God’s grace to experience glimpses of mission, in Germany, USA, Korea, China and Lebanon, as well as Morocco. My view on going abroad for mission has changed in the course of time, by re-thinking my motives. Actually i feel thirsty to know what God is doing especially, as i experienced in Lebanon and Morocco, countries where many or most people belong to Islam, and how people react when they are confronted with the gospel. In case of Lebanon, i felt also a need to help others, such as Syrian refugees. But the Lord turned my view upside down: it was them who helped me, but i took time to realize that. My encounters with them were so different andfed my hunger of real relationship to share the gospel with difficult, often miserable people who just want to survive. their warmth was Jesus belessing on ME

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By: forestsfailyou http://www.ubfriends.org/2015/01/13/missionary-empathy-5-things-i-learned-in-the-philippines/#comment-16246 Wed, 21 Jan 2015 17:16:33 +0000 http://www.ubfriends.org/?p=8775#comment-16246 I like that motto. I should think of that when I think of footprint. I am used to thinking of carbon footprint usually, but that one is much better?

Are you a missionary? Or thinking about it Libby?

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By: Libby http://www.ubfriends.org/2015/01/13/missionary-empathy-5-things-i-learned-in-the-philippines/#comment-16245 Wed, 21 Jan 2015 14:55:20 +0000 http://www.ubfriends.org/?p=8775#comment-16245 I belive it is a good way to look on this by asking oneself: i might one day leave my mission field, for good or for a while. Shall i be remembered as the one who gave
people love, friendship and respect or will i be remembered as one who Claims to know things better all the way? Watch your footprint may be a good Motto ;)

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By: c http://www.ubfriends.org/2015/01/13/missionary-empathy-5-things-i-learned-in-the-philippines/#comment-16194 Thu, 15 Jan 2015 23:45:06 +0000 http://www.ubfriends.org/?p=8775#comment-16194 Ben, yes, I left that October. Some reasons include what you articulated well, here: Refusing to face the facts and the obvious glaring stark reality as well as censorship of truths that you disagree with or dislike is the surest sign of being driven by one’s ego and the guaranteed way to live in delusion and self-deception. It is also the way to never correct oneself, improve, make progress, or truly change for the betterment of our progeny and descendents. – See more at: http://www.ubfriends.org/2015/01/03/why-ubf-should-read-brians-books-and-know-his-story-well/#comment-16191

The short form is that I was finally told to be quiet and end “negativity and criticisms,” at times directly, and at times in subtle, back-handed ways, as I’ve already mentioned, such as, “trusting in God who is sovereign (therefore, just trust your director and leaders in full submission).” A few people know how I tried my best for improvement. But without a place to speak, I didn’t have a place at all. My conscience was too bothered by what has happened and what is still going on and, in the face of losing my voice regarding these wrongs and the refusal of leadership to honestly and openly address them, not only in my chapter but from those I spoke with at the Chicago HQ as well, I felt that the only right thing to do, for the sake of my family and others, was to leave. From that time I could not in good conscience support what UBF is doing and has done. Maybe I can write a longer form version soon.

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By: forestsfailyou http://www.ubfriends.org/2015/01/13/missionary-empathy-5-things-i-learned-in-the-philippines/#comment-16193 Thu, 15 Jan 2015 23:11:27 +0000 http://www.ubfriends.org/?p=8775#comment-16193 Mirriam Webster announced that “culture” is the word for 2014. It had a large increase of searched over the internet this year. It seems it’s on a lot of peoples minds.

http://www.inc.com/steve-cadigan/culture-is-the-word-for-2014.html

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By: MJ Peace http://www.ubfriends.org/2015/01/13/missionary-empathy-5-things-i-learned-in-the-philippines/#comment-16192 Thu, 15 Jan 2015 20:16:54 +0000 http://www.ubfriends.org/?p=8775#comment-16192 Yes, I don’t like Filipino Spaghetti either and I’m Filipino. It has condensed milk in it. I wonder what Italians would think. I really enjoyed reading this article. Intercultural skills are very necessary. They need to be taught. I’m taking a class on Intercultural ministry and today we discussed the Black/White difference; it’s not only about the physical pigment of someone’s skin color. Race is a social construct that is connected to power, status and expectations. It’s interesting to notice that even among people of the same nationality, religion and skin color there are so many differences. And there can be more conflict among those who are more “alike” because they all assume that everyone else thinks like them. It’s good for people to live abroad; it takes us out of our superiority complex. American culture is not the best/worst, it’s just different.

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By: Ben Toh http://www.ubfriends.org/2015/01/13/missionary-empathy-5-things-i-learned-in-the-philippines/#comment-16188 Thu, 15 Jan 2015 14:37:01 +0000 http://www.ubfriends.org/?p=8775#comment-16188 Charles, I’m assuming you left UBF based on your statement: “…while I was still in UBF, as of last October (2014). …the same old, “trust God,” “be quiet and wait for God’s time,” were pushed on me.” – See more at: http://www.ubfriends.org/2015/01/13/missionary-empathy-5-things-i-learned-in-the-philippines/#comment-16180

Can you share with us how that transpired?

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By: c http://www.ubfriends.org/2015/01/13/missionary-empathy-5-things-i-learned-in-the-philippines/#comment-16181 Thu, 15 Jan 2015 05:59:09 +0000 http://www.ubfriends.org/?p=8775#comment-16181 Joe, a resounding Yes! on both points. For some reason, point (1) is considered a bad thing in UBF, for it might imply that not all have to obey Matthew 28:18-20 as missionaries and 1:1 Bible teachers. As for (2), such discussions were still not welcome while I was still in UBF, as of last October. Rather than being able to openly explore this obvious conclusion, which you mentioned Paul also practiced, the same old, “trust God,” “be quiet and wait for God’s time,” were pushed on me. I wished we could explore the good and wonderful side of the different gifts of the body of Christ ministering in the world.

Once, at a USA/Canada staff conference, the director of Korea UBF at the time, Samuel H. Lee, gave a presentation on the Nevius method, highlighting the importance and quick time frame of turning over leadership to natives. Without delay, as soon as the presentation was over, a USA senior staff member rushed to the podium and said, “Please don’t misunderstand his presentation. I feel like my job is threatened.” I was horrified and hugely disappointed. His insecurities seemed to me to be prevalent among directors and leaders.

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By: c http://www.ubfriends.org/2015/01/13/missionary-empathy-5-things-i-learned-in-the-philippines/#comment-16180 Thu, 15 Jan 2015 05:49:55 +0000 http://www.ubfriends.org/?p=8775#comment-16180 Thanks for sharing about your experience, forests. By the way, I think Filipino style spaghetti is delicious! It’s my preferred style of spaghetti.

You asked, “How can we work towards missionaries, should we even do so? How much should a native person change and bear with a missionary? – See more at: http://www.ubfriends.org/2015/01/13/missionary-empathy-5-things-i-learned-in-the-philippines/#sthash.JSO1Hmdc.dpuf

I’ve traveled and visited with UBF chapters in many parts of the world and have seen how many people were suffering from living in a different culture. Adjusting can be especially difficult and defeating since many missionaries carry a “bury my bones in the mission field” mindset. They’re trapped in a difficult place. At first, I too was sympathetic. I thought that they were braving on in their mission. But I noticed other patterns throughout the years, which you touched upon, such as resisting change, assuming their way is the *right* way, and passing the blame onto every other thing except their own failure to adapt (blaming students, blaming culture, blaming the campus environment, blaming iPhones, blaming internet, blaming dating, etc.). It gets worse the higher the position a missionary had, peaking with directors and senior ______.

Anyway, to answer your questions, of course there ought to be mutual respect and acceptance from both sides, in a humble, loving and Christ-like way. But I don’t think it’s right or fair anymore to ask natives to adjust for the missionaries. It becomes a slippery slope so that the servants become the ones being served. (I’m speaking very generally here.) Missionaries approach the natives. They say something to effect that God sent them in this land and so on. Natives aren’t asking the missionaries to come to their lands or to approach them or to change them. Missionaries ought to be true to what they are telling natives God has sent them to do. Missionaries ought to find out how to change themselves for those they are serving. I believe it is the very model found in Christ who is “the Word [who] became flesh.” It was also Paul’s MO, as he described in 1 Corinthians 9:20-21. But in UBF, the model is completely flipped around. Those who are recruited are demanded to be like those who recruited them, and the recruiters have no concern about themselves being changed in order to reach their audience. So we get the standard “Shepherd X” identity, the “UBF man/woman” which Brian has written about in his own case, which is prevalent and obvious.

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By: Joe Schafer http://www.ubfriends.org/2015/01/13/missionary-empathy-5-things-i-learned-in-the-philippines/#comment-16179 Wed, 14 Jan 2015 18:07:58 +0000 http://www.ubfriends.org/?p=8775#comment-16179 Forests, thanks for this article. It reminds me of a pair of articles that we published back in 2010:

http://www.ubfriends.org/2010/12/14/evangelism-and-the-gift-of-missionary-part-1/

http://www.ubfriends.org/2010/12/17/evangelism-and-the-gift-of-missionary-part-2/

For me, the take-away messages were:

(1) Being a cross-cultural missionary is a highly specialized calling. It is very hard for Christians to separate the essential message of the gospel from the specific ways that they experienced the gospel in their own culture. Only a small minority of Christians have the necessary gifts, background and discernment to do it properly. None of the original 12 apostles could do it. Even Jesus did not attempt to do it during his public ministry.

(2) Even if missionaries are gifted at cross-cultural evangelism, they ought to do what Paul did: turn leadership of their ministries over to natives as soon as possible and get out of the way. If they hang around and try to run the show, they will prevent their own ministries from growing.

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By: forestsfailyou http://www.ubfriends.org/2015/01/13/missionary-empathy-5-things-i-learned-in-the-philippines/#comment-16178 Wed, 14 Jan 2015 17:40:02 +0000 http://www.ubfriends.org/?p=8775#comment-16178 Oh yes. I agree, as I said “More and more I think that the missionary life requires throwing off one’s culture for another”. I am just saying it’s so hard. Not that it shouldn’t be tried, or cannot be done, but I empathize more.

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By: BrianK http://www.ubfriends.org/2015/01/13/missionary-empathy-5-things-i-learned-in-the-philippines/#comment-16177 Wed, 14 Jan 2015 17:32:48 +0000 http://www.ubfriends.org/?p=8775#comment-16177 Thanks for sharing. I remember having nearly the same revelations in 1992 when I spent 3 months in Russia. Based on Isaiah 6:8 I was all fired up for Jesus, ready to devote my life as a missionary…. But then the arranged marriage stuff happened.

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By: Ben Toh http://www.ubfriends.org/2015/01/13/missionary-empathy-5-things-i-learned-in-the-philippines/#comment-16176 Wed, 14 Jan 2015 14:50:14 +0000 http://www.ubfriends.org/?p=8775#comment-16176 Thanks, Forests. This is the most empathetic post I’ve read, which I am sure all UBF missionaries would love and appreciate. I mostly agree with what you wrote. I’ve stated often that some ubf missionaries are among the most hospitable, well-intentioned and genuinely loving people I’ve known. Yet cultural differences exist and are deeply rooted. I wrote a blog not too long ago about the differences between eastern and western culture.

My kickback to your post is that missionaries are supposed to adapt to the foreign culture, like Hudson Taylor did, which all missionaries think they are emulating. Missionaries are not supposed to make the indigenous people adapt to their culture, which has been the “failure” of missionaries, including British missionaries who tried to evangelize India, Africa, Asia based on British values and culture (which Hudson Taylor did not do). In my opinion I do not think that some ubf missionaries are able to acknowledge this or see this.

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