that's why NO/DISOBEY/MISS/OBJECT must be our middle name..

OH HOLY SPIRIT, SEND THY FRUIT OF PEACE/JOY/LOVE/ETC, TO OUR CHILDREN FIRST, THEN TO ADULTS WILLING TO REACH OUT TO YOU

but ah well, the israelites shouldn’t have needed to be told

certainly the pharisees had no excuse for needing to be told..

You are correct. We must give hope. We must get up and try.

If a single UBF person wants to date, there is ONLY ONE REASON: they are full of lust.

If a UBF member is sick, they is also ONLY ONE REASON: they are basically lazy and making excuses, because they do not want to work hard and sacrifice for mission and make the chapter director look good.

ubf needs no more lectures. ubf needs sermons given by preachers.

HA! How long have you been in ubf? You know very well why a ubf director would chastise a sick coworker.

It is the same reason I was called Satan for attending my brothers wedding. When I confronted the ubf director who called me Satan, he said “As a policy I never call people Satan. I don’t remember doing that. Why would we call anyone Satan?”

I’m sick of the false innocence! Are ubf directors so blind? And why don’t you answer me directly?

What Joshua addresses is quite valid. Likely, because of Asian culture, you–as a beloved longstanding older UBF missionary family–will be highly regarded, while a young native shepherd’s family, might be regarded differently.

Also, the problems that UBFriends primarily addresses is the hierarchical authoritarianism and spiritual abuse that clearly has wounded countless people who have gone through UBF through out our 50 year history. If you care to, do review and critique my sermon from last Sun at West Loop that directly addresses where I believe UBF leaders have clearly disobeyed Jesus: http://westloop-church.org/index.php/messages/23-matthews-gospel/317-shepherding-sheep-mt-2025-28

But I have a question for your honest contemplation: do you think the loving response of the congregation would have been the same if, instead of cancer, your wife was suffering from chronic depression, and instead of a missionary, she was a young local shepherdess with little children? Do you think they would still have visited her and played guitar with her and treated with so much well-deserved dignity and respect? Or do you think she would have been chastised, criticized, blamed, rebuked, trained, called merely “a sheep’s wife”, and held out at arm’s length to suffer?

I have also observed the unbounded love, generosity, hospitality, and care of many brothers and sisters in UBF. Everybody on this blog has. We have never disputed that. Our dispute is that a little leaven spoils the whole batch. It should be honestly identified and cast out so that the genuinely loving people can serve God unhindered as He intends.

Wesley asked why we care so much what “crazy” things the church leader did. You gave a good answer. These things were not just “crazy”, they were sins. People in the church must always care about sin. I never read any rebukes in the Bible that people weren’t doing enough mission, I only read rebukes that people in the chruch sinned or tolerated sin.

Note that this example not only shows that Samuel Lee did “crazy” things, but that he made all the others do crazy things as well. Isn’t it crazy to ask your wife to give away her newborn child to another family? Isn’t it crazy of all the bystanders who knew of this story to not rebuke Samuel Lee for doing such things? The only person who does not behave crazy in this example is Wesley’s wife. Thank God! This example does not only tell a story about Samuel Lee, but also about the people in his organization.

Also note that this is not the only story of this kind. I remember that the reform movement in Germany started because Peter Chang in Bonn demanded that she gave away her child for adoption to him. This missionary bitterly complained in a letter about this and other abuse, and even Samuel Lee was informed. Guess what Lee did. He started to praise Peter Chang. Instead of Chang, the reformers were explelled from the organization. At that time I was shocked. But now things start to become much clearer.

You mentioned earlier crawling on hands and legs. That is what UBF has been doing to my eyes; it is crawling because it is legs are broken, its hands are unwhole, and its body has all kinds of sickness and unwholeness. My current church doesn’t pride itself in doing campus mission, but I’ve seen literally dozens of university students come to faith since I joined this church in August. And it’s not a very large church, just a healthy one. So I say, stop crawling and get better–restore the connection among believers, build bridges to the ones broken in the past, seek fresh leading from the Spirit. Then, once the healing has been completed, UBF won’t have to crawl, but it can run freely and powerfully in the ways God wants.

@gc: thanks for your words. I appreciate that you boldly tell the truth and speak your mind from a standpoint of love.

Wesley, I agree with what you say here in terms of what can be changed in UBF. But your words are insensitive to anyone who has been out of UBF for more then 5 years. Why would someone like that come to UBFriends with no better interest than to see someone in high position from the ministry denounce the past publicly and make a move to more sound Biblical doctrinal practice.

I am sorry Joshua. Wesley, Joshua is a perfect example of a young shepherd family who left within the past year because of the abusive system and authority. His testimony and struggle to deal with many troubles in his heart are public to be seen on UBFriends. I kid you not, he gave everything he could before reaching that final point. There could be many other examples but many people today are not ready to open up. So if you want to really know what is happening now you need to apply the various questions of accountability that can be found on UBFriends internally for each chapter director/wife to come forward, but I doubt that will happen.

We have talked about family a lot here. As for family, I find the whole behaviour sickening. First, men and women are groomed to be married. With this both senior members feel a little smug. Second, the question, “Any good news?” is persistently asked. When a pregnancy does occur it has been subject to the convenience in ministry (see past comments, especially Chris). Third, once the family is established beyond a married couple the children themselves are treated to feel like an inconvenience. Why have them? ….

It is no wonder why in some cases families break apart. However I do not know big bear – my heart goes out to him. Past or present all of the testimony, reflection and honest discussion are important here. I agree we need present day examples – but do you really mean what you say? All the time these discussions reflect the past you can write it off. You can undermine it. You can turn a blind eye, because that was not your leadership – it was someone else’s.

I have already stated that I still remain in UBF. I am happy to, but, under the present state of things I for one will not be quiet and shut up. I will not – I will never melt in your waters.

One more thing: Joshua repeated not once but at two or three times that he was warned about having his sins exposed if he did not stop publishing on UBFriends. This is a very real example of why present day (ex)members are reluctant to speak about what they see and hear every day.

Probably should ask one of the 20 families who left Toledo the last several years…

@Joshua: You are correct. It is unthinkable that one who claims to be “God’s anointed” would demand someone to give away their child. This is wrong theology based on 1) Abraham did not actually kill Isaac but kept him, which was God’s point and 2) God did give up his son, but that means we don’t have to because God’s sacrifice was complete. The sacrificial system ended and was fulfilled in Jesus.

Ben already responded and I agree with him.

You wrote “is it to dig out the funny and crazy things that a dead person did”. First, these things are not funny. They are crazy, but not just crazy, they are also prime examples of authority abuse. It is exactly what Samuel Lee did: He ursupated the role of God in the lives of people. Or rather the role of a caricature of an Old Testament God. Second, the point is that Samuel Lee was not just a “dead person”, but the founder and general director of UBF! He was the one who taught all the people in UBF including you, so that you have become unable to see how unethical and horrible all of this is. This needs to be exposed, and UBF most officially denounced the underlying teachings. This is the first priority, before reaching out to any unsaved people. UBF has unclean hands, and should not try to reach out to “unsaved” people with dirty hands.

And your words “Is it to reach out to the unsaved every corner of this country even if it means to crawl on our knees and elbows all over the land?” sound like Matthew 23:15 to me.

Me and Chris and Vitaly and big bear are not the way we are because ubf failed. We are the way we are now because the ubf system did what it is designed to do. The ubf system “worked”. The problem is that the ubf system is designed to raise heartless yes-men who don’t know how to love their wives or children. We each hit the ceiling of the ubf system and had to leave otherwise we would have nothing left to salvage of from our conscience and our lives.

“is it to dig out the funny and crazy things that a dead person did during his lifetime because they caused us to be hurt, depressed or whatever?”

I for one could not give a rat’s patookie about that dead man or the stupid things he did. I want answers to my two demands and the abuse in 2013 to stop.

My objection and distaste is your argument by using the story of the priest and the condemned criminal. I have already heard such arguments over the past decade, expressed somewhat like this: Why do people waste time on UBFriends instead fishing and feeding sheep?

I hope you and other UBF chapter directors, elders and missionaries who use such reasoning can somehow see that it is really quite a distasteful, flawed and offensive statement and argument. To be honest it makes me feel quite sick and upset–not at you personally, but at those who make such insensitive statements and arguments without considering the implication, arrogance and accusation of what that communicates to others.

I just came back from a conference in Odessa and didn’t read your comment until now. You are absolutely right. We must let free water to flow in and out of our Christian lakes or ponds. Also we are responsible for cleaning up our water. I like your quote of Henry Kriete. We need a new wave of the Holy Spirit to come to our ministry. Jesus refered to the Holy Spirit as the spring of living water in John 4. How? We must start with the pond that we are in now. I think our chapter is more like a small fish bowl than a pond. So it is easier to clean than the pond of UBF. Our chapter is open to suggestion and even John is going to seminary school to learn more about theology.

In his letter to the ICOC church, Henry Kriete used a similar analogy, comparing the church with a stream that had been dammed up, because they were not in exchange with other churches, but created their own practices and teachings and just like UBF allowed people only to marry inside the church. He wanted the church to become a freely flowing stream again, that has the ability to purify itself:

“In finding its medial course a stream may wash from bank to bank. Although it receives pollutants constantly, the flowing stream tends to purify itself. Dam it up, and it stagnates and breeds all sorts of scum and slime. The free-flowing stream is in a constant purifying process even though it is never pure in the strictest sense.

So it is with the church. The free, autonomous disciples must be permitted to go unrestricted by earthly rulers. Free people may vary in interpretation and understanding in different congregations and in different generations. The church may go from one extreme to the other as it seeks constantly to correct its course. The church will have constant danger of impurities, so it will always be in a state of reformation, but because it is composed of erring humans, it will never be without flaw entirely. One generation cannot crystallize and credalize a system in order to guarantee that its concepts will be bound on the next generation to insure its faithfulness. Efforts to control the next generation are attempts to force unity by conformity. When the stream is dammed up, it becomes stagnant and begins to depend upon intellectual inbreeding, which produces doctrinal monstrosities.”

Jesus said: Woe to you Pharisees..; I think the meaning included: Whoa horse/hold your horses/wait a minute. He was calling them to repent & eventually some did:

Acts 6:7 “And the word of God increased; and the number of the disciples multiplied in Jerusalem greatly; and a great company of the priests were obedient to the faith.” And of course Saul, the religious murderer, later became Paul, the spiritual mentor..

Herein lies our challenge: to take current religion to another level. Many have risked to pave the way: most recently Joe, Ben, & others. Our choice is simple. We can shrink back into hierarchy/benefits/fearful bondages/pleasant delusions/etc

OR we can lead by seeking “the more excellent way” of God’s Spirit

Thanks for sharing this. I also love UBF and am so thankful that God has used it for me to meet Christ and in many other ways. At the same time, I am grieved to hear about what happened to you and others. I know that you say these things publicly because you want to do what is right before God and you care about the future of the church as well as the many sincere people in it. Thank you for your devotion and service in Christ. May God bless you and John and your family.

One issue is that there is a clash / misunderstanding between those who value loyalty and those who value candor. But they are not mutually exclusive. In fact, love for God and man involves both. And yes true loyalty is loyalty to Christ who is most faithful to us. As such, we are committed to the Lord and have a bond as members of his body whether inside or outside UBF. Mark’s example of the prophet Nathan rebuking King David shows that loyalty before God and even criticism of leaders could co-exist in an Old Testament monarchy: when necessary how much more valid is it within the body of Christ in the 21st century!

leaders must not be afraid to correct ourselves & one another to honor God;
we must be afraid to OVERHONOR MAN & end up DISHONORING GOD;
The Holy Spirit Rules!

& yes believers are brothers/sisters in Christ, part of his body, with Him alone as Head..leaders of religion are to be mentors/facilitators; Jesus is the living Cornerstone & Capstone (top/center stone of arch), we are living stones built into his building by the Holy Spirit.

& why is a system needed? (unless a system of encouragement) Do we not trust the Holy Spirit to guide us?

I am going to critique this presentation on my own blog soon (If I can stomach it…this presentation makes me literally ill…).

Slide 20 is most interesting. And the associated note: “20. After meeting your new sheep through your outreach, you may need to develop a relationship with your new sheep step by step; Curiosity >Test >Infatuation >Fatigue >Matured True Love.”

Yea, you may need to develop a relationship…but hopefully not. Hopefully you can just produce a shepherd product out of the sheep material without any personal interaction. It’s easier that way.

I think you nailed it Chris: “For instance, in the last passage of the presentation notes he says “I learn from the God of Paul that God’s work is not done by special methods, but through the Holy Spirit”. He says this after just having shared a presentation that was all about explaining the special methods the UBF invitation and indoctrination process as the only system to create a “healthy ministry”…

Indeed, the only thing “double-ministry” does is give you a double-mind.

For example, Slide 20 is an ultimate hypocrisy: On one hand ubf prohibits dating because it is “sinful”. And yet they want to “fall in love” with their sheep step-by-step?? “Curiosity >Test >Infatuation >Fatigue >Matured True Love.”?

Slide 10: Does the slide with the UBF hamster wheel indicate that people after going through the various stations of indoctrination and training as leaders need to be born again (again and again)?

Slide 12: “Disciple products“. I think this is at the core of all problems. UBF leaders view their followers not as peers and friends, not even as human beings, but just as “products”.

Slide 16: “Relational approach”. This slide clearly shows that this approach always creates a hierarchy with a human leader at the top or center, which is very different from what Jesus envisioned, namely that Christians should be all brothers with no human “master” (Mt 23).

Slide 19: Does this slide suggest employing “front groups” (as many well-known cults do)?

By the way, I found the notes for that presentation here:
http://dupage-ubf.org/documents/BibleLectures/Wording_based_on_Power_Point.docx

One phenomenon I learned in UBF is that they often say the exact opposite in what they really believe, to the total confusion of listeners. For instance, in the last passage of the presentation notes he says “I learn from the God of Paul that God’s work is not done by special methods, but through the Holy Spirit”. He says this after just having shared a presentation that was all about explaining the special methods the UBF invitation and indoctrination process as the only system to create a “healthy ministry” (“healthy” in the sense of creating the highest and most unvarying quality of “disciple products”) and without mentioning the Holy Spirit anywhere before. UBF follows this pattern in all areas: Officially they claim something, but in reality they do the opposite. This dissociative mind also shows up in the formulation “the God of Paul” as if there were multiple different Gods or God would only exist in the imagination of a certain person.

And then the last passage also shows their real motivation behind doing all of this: It gives them the feeling they are somebody “special”. And they just love this feeling above all. Quote: “through the special men who … seek God’s glory alone like Apostle Paul, like Dr. Samuel Lee, and like you, my respective European National directors.” The more disciples someone “produces”, the more he can puff up his ego and believe he is somebody special. That’s what I am bemoaning regarding UBF: In all of its history, it mainly produced puffed-up leaders and uniform “disciple products” as well as disappointed and hurt dropouts and “collateral damage” to people and Christianity in general, and it is still praising this system as the way to go to create a “healthy ministry”.

[Note: This is the stuff ubf directors think about constantly. So I urge caution if you view this presentation…it is a glimpse inside the messed-up mind of a ubf loyalist-type director.]

When you are standing there with about 2,000 people on Sunday morning, and you hear the chant of the Missionary Pledge, ask yourself: Does this sound Christ-like? Is this something Jesus wants his followers to do?

Or does this seem more like this?

By the way, this is what makes ubf directors salivate. What many hardliner ubf soldiers really want is a worldwide business with galvanized workers to ensure their lineage will remain as long as possbile. They are using the name of Christ to do so because they see a method to build an eternal kingdom. Too bad they aren’t paying attention to what Jesus really said.

And wow does the report actually say this… “He also pointed out that as disciples of Jesus we have so many spiritual riches to gain and also some human riches, like brothers and sisters in Christ; we are definitely not losers!”

And yes it also says this, which is the clearest expression of what the worldwide ubf network is really all about:

“After making a good profit in the first year, Dr. Marc Choi used all this money to buy the present center in the heart of Paris. Still God continued to bless them. God has used this company also to grant proper jobs for missionaries. Not least of all, being a businesswoman also earns M. Rebecca respect among tough French students. Although the present economic situation doesn’t seem inspiring, Dr. Marc and Rebecca Choi have a vision that God may use LIKE to support 100 missionaries to Africa.”

1. We are soldiers of the Lord Jesus Christ. By correctly handling the word of God, we want to establish a Christian view of life.

1. We are soldiers of the Lord Jesus Christ. For the sake of Bible Korea and World Mission, we participate in the sufferings of Christ voluntarily.

Notice the number “1” repeated. That is not a typo. That is because for the ubf soldier both are “prime directives”. To SB and SL and all the senior ubf people, this oath is binding forever and commits you to a holy soldier life. This is at the core of the ubf silence toward former members. I am just a fallen soldier who rejects his mission and purpose of life in their eyes.

Anyway, I’m giving this conference the benefit of the doubt and I hope it’ll be good. But I won’t be taking any KOPHN soldier oath..I rather go to a workshop affiliated with ubfriends, presenting the articles that don’t get accepted into the PIG groups (or whatever term you use for those.) Topics about John 17 and Daniel and Revelations and other passages of the Bible that get overlooked.

That is what UBF leaders say, and UBF is not the only one doing 1:1 bible study. I was in a 1:1 study before I came to ubf!!!

Can I say this loud and clear…UBF is not the only ministry that does 1:1 discipleship. Intervarsity and Campus Crusade both do 1:1 outreach. yes, its an awesome way to build up the church, without the controlling methods we have in UBF.

I’ve heard those words before by UBF “spiritual” leaders when my friends were leaving UBF.

“I am not going to leave ubf. There is no perfect Christian church. ubf is not perfect either. But ubf has a great advantage such as 1:1 Bible study. I don’t understand why you want to join other churches, I love ubf.”

UBF leaders really take pride in their 1:1 bible study method and their organization.I heard from a UBF leader at a Easter Bible Conference say that, “the best way to serve God is 1:1 bible study” I was sitting down cringing as I was hearing it. When I stopped doing 1:1 with my former bible teacher, people thought I wasn’t repenting, which was not true. It’s funny how gossips quickly spread in a fellowship.I also heard that I had “Marriage by Faith” problem. Not agreeing with MBF, it doesn’t mean I have a MBF problem. As Christians, we are suppose to marry the person has God for us by faith. I guess they were talking about UBF’s MBF. When I heard it, I was very shocked that they would think like that. In regards with 1:1, I was doing bible study by myself and reading books about theology. My faith grow more doing that than if I continue bible study 1:1 with a shepherd or a shepherdess. To be honest, 1:1 was not very good for me because of the authoritativeness of the shepherd. I felt like a prisoner. I’m not saying 1:1 is not good but it’s actually good. It just depends how the shepherd or shepherdess handle shepherding.

This is the sermon of Richard Owen Roberts whom Chris linked for the topic of Corporate repentance.

His message based on 2 Chronicle 7:14

What we need to look for is genuine repentance that DOESN’T LOOK PAST the real ugliness and pain of sins committed. That’s why we have to keep confronting it.

At the same time we have to fight against our own tendency toward disdain and resentment.

Thank you very much for your comments. I agree that corporate repentance is needed and Biblical. 2 Chronicles 7:14 says, “if my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and I will forgive their sin and will heal their land.” In some cases repentance is hard, but it provides a wonderful direction for us and a promise that God will forgive and heal.

I think that sometimes UBF leaders asked others to repent in a one sided manner. They are the ones who need to repent in these cases of abuse. But we should be careful that in asking them to repent we don’t become like the monster we are fighting. In my opinion, we should all be aware of our own frailty and ask the Lord for his help and mercy for all us during this process.

I am so sorry to hear about the cases of abuse. I know the hurt was and is real, and what happened misrepresented the character of our gracious Lord who is gentle and humble in heart.

In our case, the only thing that makes this a bit more complex is that UBF is not a single “local” church, but an organization of many local churches. So what to do if your local chapter is not as bad as the one Vitaly experienced? Should we apply this teaching to the whole organization of UBF then, and leave UBF anyway, even if some chapters are nice and making progress? I think everybody needs to decide this for himself. There is a certain limit, though. By associating with certain people or organization and supporting them directly or indirectly, you become partially responsible for what they are doing. The Bible teaches this very clearly. See for instance Eph 5:11.

I think Vitaly and Brian made the right step in leaving, but what Ben and Joe are doing is also right. However, it will become more and more difficult for them the longer UBF does not make any progress in terms of public repentance.

“What I meant was our role is a doctor like Jesus on earth not the policeman or judge who is coming.”

Basically I agree with this. But there are certain situations where Christians actually need to be judges, or even like policeman. This is when sin is openly committed inside the church under the name of Christianity. You see an example in 1Cor 5, where Pauls says at the end “Are you not to judge those inside?“ This is a rhetorical question. The answer is clear: Inside the church, there should be judgment about the conduct of people. This is also known as church discipline. This is also the content of Mt 18:15-17. In the end, it someone is stubbornly, absolutely unrepentant, and does not listen to the church, he should we treated as pagan or tax collector. Similarly the passage mentioned by Vitaly, Titus 3:10-11. What is this other than judgment? Of course, this is not final judgment. Such treatment may help the person to later repent anyway. The final judgement is made by God. But inside the church, judgement should take place, absolutely. And the problems we are dealing with here are such a case, where the people of the church or the organization of UBF should judge.

Jesus was like a doctor for the sinners, that is right, but he dealt very differently with some of the Pharisees who believed they don’t need a doctor and they are themselves the doctors. It is such people we are actually dealing with.

“Cobb: What’s the most resilient parasite? An idea. A single idea from the human mind can build cities. An idea can transform the world and rewrite all the rules. Which is why I have to steal it.”

And from Lenin:
“Why should freedom of speech and freedom of the press be allowed? Why should a government which is doing what it believes to be right allow itself to be criticized? It would not allow opposition by lethal weapons. Ideas are much more fatal things than guns. Why should any man be allowed to buy a printing press and disseminate pernicious opinions calculated to embarrass the government?”

“An idea can transform the world and rewrite all the rules.”
“Ideas are much more fatal things than guns.”

Keep the ideas coming and brain juices flowing. I like it. +1

“He that is unjust, let him be unjust still: and he which is filthy, let him be filthy still: and he that is righteous, let him be righteous still: and he that is holy, let him be holy still” (Rev.22:11)

I believe, UBF leaders had never learned to humble themselves to apologize or to confess and repent their own sins before God and OTHERS, because they have never seen that from their leader. I think they are starting from 99%. It would be hard to go down to even 95% from 99%. It might be harder than going from 1% to 0.5%.

All Christians should accept each other, whether they are at 99% or 1%. We should not accept their behavior but accept people as Jesus accepted us when were were 100% wrong. It’s so sad and wrong if SL supporters ask you to be 0% to talk to them. I think they may not listen to you either when you are 0%, faultless because they are not listening to Jesus’ word.

I fully support what Joe is doing. I think no man could do better than what Joe is doing. My honest prayer is that he may not lose his heart and continue to walk in love when he goes through this path.

Chris, you are right. Cancer patient is damaging others including his own family. What I meant was our role is a doctor like Jesus on earth not the policeman or judge who is coming.

What I meant is sincere repentance and confession of sin on the part of all of us including people at every level in UBF and outside of UBF, accepting the forgiving grace and mercy of our Lord through the blood of Jesus.

I agree fully, aw. There is a large crowd gathered already at the foot of the cross. We (former and current) are waiting for ubf directors to join us there. As joshua says eloquently just now, there is no reconciliation if we go to the cross in our minds only, and don’t make every effort to also come to the people involved. That is merely a fantasy worldview. Many of us former members and now a growing number of current members are all waiting at the cross to see the day of jubiliee when ubf directors come to join us instead of walking over us to go about their mission.

Likewise, you could also say that the behavior of the reformers before they started the reform was immature, when they sent offering money to the headquarters without ever requesting a statement of accounts and knowing what the money was used for, of tolerating many unbiblical practices and teachings in UBF, just because they were propagated by the top leader.

They think that as leaders their honor is “higher” and that to apologize and confess their sins publicly (which they require of their sheep) is to loose face. Until this changes (by the miraculous work of the Holy Spirit), the most common response of the top UBF leaders and most recognized UBF heroes in every continent of the world will be SILENCE and INDIFFERENCE.

It seems that God’s marines are too busy fighting the good fight on the campuses of the world to join us wounded ones here with Jesus at the cross.

Why are old school UBF leaders angry with UBFriends? Firstly, they should be angry! because it is addressing issues and abuses that some of them refuse to address by insisting that they are right, and that God has blessed UBF for 50 years, etc, and that those who come to UBFriends are wasting their time and not “going fishing and feeding sheep.” Do some of these leaders go fishing and feed sheep themselves? Or are they more interested in playing political posturing and positioning of their own power in UBF?

Sure, how the reformers proceeded was not as mature as would have been desirable. But you can’t expect that from people who lived for so many years in an environment that promoted immaturity and stifled critical thinking and open communication and cooperative problem solving. The reformers were not saints. That would be the same black and white thinking again. And they never learned how to make a reform “properly”. They only learned obedience. By the way, their refusal to send their tithe until there was proper accounting is understandable for me. (Ab)use of offering money and lack of proper accounting was one of the issues in 1976 and 2001 again.

It’s encouraging for me to see you recognizing the actual problem as the cancer that is corroding UBF. 10 years ago, I was told that the reformers, i.e. those who talked about the problem, were the cancer of UBF. You said a doctor doesn’t blame the patient (e.g. for drinking alcohol or smoking). I’m not so sure. At least he will clearly point out that smoking was a possible cause of the problem and that it is bad and the patient should stop. Also, the picture is not quite applicable because the sickness of UBF does not only affect UBF itself, but many people who are invited by UBF. Maybe you could compare this with “passive smoking”. I really would blame parents who smoke heavily in the presence of their young children.

I am not saying SL or UBF were more mature than R-group.
I would say, the failure is due to 99% of SL side and 1% to R-group side. What I wanted to say is that SL used that 1% as a foothold to accuse R-group as political rebels and many were convinced, and focused the 1%, which made the communication even harder till now.

It might be unfair, if I just point out 1% of immaturity but ignore 99%. I believe 99% reasons have been discussed a lot on this site.
I think God also sees that 1% and He is not happy about it because it does not represent Jesus. Maybe in God’s eye, it is 50%, we are doing the exactly the same ungodly thing. It does not mean we should stop talking about it, it’s greater sin to be quiet and doing nothing to injustice and ungodliness.

The 1% I wanted to point out was that, before CMI leaders came to talk to SL politely, they had already sent the letter to all leaders and missionaries, which was eventually leaked out to whole UBF members. They refused to send tithe to UBF headquarter and refused to come to World Mission Report. They used their relational power to gather more people to their side. (I know this wouldn’t happen if SL responded in godly manner in the first place) This brought some division to mission fields where there were mixed group of each side. Most leaders were very patient, kind and gentle. But some people under them did speak very ungodly words in public, and the leaders let that happen. I don’t think they were sometimes rude, brutal, or slanderous. They were treated like that by SL for many years. I was with CMI group when they started reform movement. I love them and still support what they did in general. But it doesn’t mean that they were perfect in doing it. It’s easier to make mistakes when we are angry and frustrated. I can understand that. But we should not give any foothold to Satan to take advantage of it. Satan will use those things to destroy the both sides. Many people failed to see Jesus through both sides, they left the both sides. Some weak believers left Jesus in the middle of it.

The reason I mention this is to avoid making the same mistakes.
I am not saying, we can be successful in restoring UBF by following Jesus’ instruction perfectly. Jesus didn’t grantee the 100% success in doing that.

But one thing I am little bit optimistic about this time, a lot of people in UBF think it is not political or relational issue. Those list Joe mentioned have grown like tumor for 50 years, it is hurting the whole body now, many people recognized that they got cancer which need to be removed with major operation. Some deny that that they have cancer, some don’t know how to deal with this cancer because it is been long and all spread over whole body, try to ignore it unless it it not hurting so much. Some want to get long-term therapy with less risk and pain. But the doctor never blame the patient why he got the cancer. Maybe he have lived in unhealthy life style (alcohol, smoking). Maybe his environment was not really healthy. There may be more complicated reason for that cancer. But a doctor don’t blame the patient. A doctor wants to heal him. (Well I should stop here)

But here is what I experienced. In addition to my own shortcoming and failures, I often have to deal with this: ubfers see the mirror I’m holding up, and what they see is ugly. But instead of realizing they are seeing a refecltion of themselves and their teaching, they think they are seeing me. The person holding up the mirror often gets blamed for being the source of the ugliness. That has been my cross to bear lately.

I too have experienced a severe lack of self-awareness and introspection among directors. The first thought of a director when someone leaves is “what is wrong with them”.

This reminds me of something our pastor said in one of our cohort groups when a long-time leader left our church to follow other pursuits. Our pastor’s first response was “what is wrong with me”. The parting was peaceful but even then he met the person right way and wanted to know what he could have done better to make them want to stay longer. He was not overbearing, but sincerely wanted to know.

So my point here is that maybe one of the best things for ubers to do is to look in a mirror and have some objective and honest introspection combined with earnest action to go and meet people who left and ask them what could be done better.

There been the tendency for ubf members to think that all people who have any misgivings about ubf are of one mind and that they are all part of some unified movement or conspiracy. It’s simply not true.