A “Person of Peace” And The Family

“I thank my God every time I remember you. 4 In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy 5 because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now.” (Phil 1:3-4, NIV)

Paul wrote this letter to the Philippian believers around 62 A.D. while he was in prison in Rome. He was so happy about their partnership in the Gospel. He opens his letter with these words to them;

“Paul and Timothy, servants of Christ Jesus, To all God’s holy people in Christ Jesus at Philippi, together with the overseers and deacons: 2 Grace and peace to you from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ. 3 I thank my God every time I remember you. 4 In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy 5 because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now, 6 being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” (Phil 1:1-6, NIV)

Philippi was a Roman colony in Macedonia. There were not many open doors for ministry in Philippi for there were few Jews there, and no synagogue. But God opened door there and into all of Europe. Acts 16:11-40 describes how Paul pioneered the church in Philippi. Paul met Lydia who accepted Jesus and opened her house to Paul and those with him. Paul met with the brothers there and encouraged them. A jailer and his whole family accepted the gospel and were baptized as believers. They were the first in Europe to join with Paul in propagating the Gospel. The Philippians remembered and supported Paul in his gospel ministry from the time he left them. Paul thanked God for their wonderful partnership. They continue to be his most faithful supporters in so many ways. When Paul remembered them, his heart was filled with joy and he honestly felt that it was a privilege to have them as partners in the gospel along with him.

In Acts 16:11-40, we can see three components of mission that are needed for every mission to be effective. We find Paul and his missionary team preaching the Gospel in a new community. We see Lydia and the jailor. They are converts. The jailer’s family all accepted the Gospel. They are the ones who invited Paul and his mission team into their homes. They are the ones that introduced Paul to their friends and neighbors. A new Gentile Christian church could be established because God worked in the hearts of these people, the first believers. Maybe Lydia or the jailor, were a “person of peace” and the other an “ancestor of faith”. We also see families. Paul did not have a family, but we see Lydia, who may have had one and the jailor who did. All of these are partners in the Gospel, vital components in forming this new church plant in Philippi and making inroads into Europe.

Part 1: Introduction

In this series we are investigating the different components of a successful missionary endeavor. In the development of a mission, there are not just missionaries. There are other missional entities, which partner in unison, to allow the body of Christ to thrive. God desires for all of them to work together. The important thing is to recognize these parts of the body and nurture working relationships with them as we live as missionaries. Anything less is neglecting part of the body of Christ and hindering the work of the missionary.

I propose that the most fruitful path to embark on, as missionaries, is nurturing solid relationships with six missional entities, all of which are part of the body of Christ.

1. Relationships with… a sending church
2. Relationships with… a mission agency
3. Relationships with… a receiving church
4. Relationships with… a missionary team
5. Relationships with… a “person of peace”
6. Relationships with… the family

This paper will define the six areas of relationship building. Our own family experience as a house church will be reflected upon. The things learned from the current mission to the Canada will added. There will also be some advice on how to nurture the relationships in the six areas.

The first part dealt with the necessity of nurturing relationships with a sending church and a mission agency. This second dealt with relationships with a receiving church and a missionary team. This third part will expound on the relationships with a person of peace and the family. The point of all this is to share about some ways that missionaries can be strengthened as they follow Jesus. Let’s see.

Part 2: Nurture A Relationship With A “Person Of Peace.”

A “person of peace” is one who is able to invite the missionary into a community. In the cross cultural setting, the missionary is the outsider. They are the minority. They may not even have a means of entering a community, without an invitation from an insider. Successful missionaries wait for God to send a person of peace to invite them into a community in order to serve the Gospel mission among the people.

With no “person of peace”, there is little hope in establishing a thriving Christian community among a particular people group. There is the heavy burden of being a constant outsider. There is always a long range prayer that someone, within the community, would come alongside the mission. But that may take years, decades, if it ever happens at all.

A person who is sort of a “person of peace”, but not really….is what my previous ministry called an “Abraham of faith.” Missionaries pray and pray for an “Abraham of faith”. This person is the first native convert that answers to same call of God which the missionaries have answered. They share in the same vision and mission as they come alongside the missionaries in a life of service with them.

Without a person of peace, sent by God, missionaries lay unreal expectations on their ancestor of faith, and other Bible students. Such a person is loaded with hopes and expectations by the missionaries, to help the missionaries navigate within the culture and invite native believers into church. Their plan might be to send a native Bible student to the community to make friends with the people and then the missionary would take over the discipleship. It is like a disciple assembly line. Though many hopes are laid up them, the converts might not function as a “person of peace.” They are a convert, yes. They may participate in ministry, yes. But they may not be able to penetrate a culture as the missionaries hope. They may operate outside the culture, for years with the missionaries. It is important not to lay hopes and our own expectations on those whom God sends. Bill Mills and Craig Parro of Leadership Resources International say it well,

“It is not only our dreams that cause us to be vulnerable and to give up in the ministry. The dreams of others also bring us great pressure. Many of our pastors are losing heart because they are not measuring up to the expectations of their people. Following Jesus’ ministry lifestyle of “wanting to see what God is doing” and entering into His eternal work is our greatest protection from burning out under the expectations of those whom God has given us in ministry.” (Finishing Well In Life And Ministry. Bill Mills and Craig Parro. Leadership Resources International. 2008-6^th printing. p. 240)

“I have heard from many pastors of small churches who find it very difficult to attend their denominational meetings or even to meet with a small group of fellow pastors. Rather than being built up and encouraged, these times often cause them to loose heart. It seems that there is no possibility any more for a small church to be healthy and have substantial ministry, for the pastors are sent the message, ‘If your church is not growing numerically, there is something wrong with you and your methods. If you are doing it right, your church will grow.” In North America we are future-oriented pragmatists who are committed to progress and who expect growth. We are convinced that “if we do these things that are proven to work, then we will achieve the success we desire.” However, God does not fit into that mindset. As we have seen in other places in our study, many pastors are losing their ability to endure under these pressures to produce.” (Finishing Well In Life And Ministry. Bill Mills and Craig Parro. Leadership Resources International. 2008-6^th printing. Page 241.)

It is so difficult to engage in cross cultural ministry without a “person of peace.” In one northern Canadian community I heard of a missionary family who built a house church across the lake from a First Nation community. They were not in the community. They tried to minister for a while, but eventually stopped. They were always on the outside of the culture. It is doubtful that fruitful long-term mission can be established without a “person of peace”, for the ministry will always be operating on the periphery of the culture.

We never had a person of peace to invite us into the culture of the campus. We were happy if we had a house close to the campus to live in and minister out of. We would begin a ministry among the students without an invitation into the community. We simply moved to a town and regularly went to campus to invite students to study the Bible. If they accepted the invitation to 1:1 Bible study…great! If not, then we would move on. I never thought we needed a person of peace to invite us into the campus community. This had significant repercussions in the success of our mission.

I was content to carry out my mission, without a “person of peace” for fourteen years. We had a faithful Bible student who became a faithful friend and fellow worker in our mission, for a while. After she left, there were a few other Bible students, but none were the “person of peace” that we needed. As a result, we were constantly operating on the periphery of the campus culture for fourteen years. In the end, I can say that I never did become part of the campus community, not even the campus Christian community. I was operating on the outside of the culture, never making lasting inroads into the community we were called to serve.

Without a “person of peace” and being a single family house church, ours was a lonely mission. There was always a looming sense of failure, for we were always wondering why we couldn’t become established in the campus culture. We spent 14 years pondering how to better serve as a campus ministry, but it just didn’t happen, mainly because we didn’t have a close relationship with a “person of peace”, inviting us in. What we needed was a Christian who was an insider to the campus culture, to introduce us and support our work. That person might have been, possibly a Christian professor or a Christian leader on campus or a Christian worker on the campus. I am not sure. But one thing I know, that person would have been heaven sent.

Recently, a retired Baptist pastor asked me, “How do you find this person of peace?” I came to the conclusion that it is really a divine event. That person must be established and introduced by God himself. There is no way that we can find such a person on our own. We must pray, depend on God and keep our eyes open. In this way all the glory goes to God, and not to our own strategies and human efforts.

In the mission, I am now involved in, a “person of peace” literally made an impassioned plea for missionaries, to our receiving church, two weeks before we first made contact in the region! It was obvious to all that this was the hand of God for God’s fingerprints were all over it. All people involved in the mission, were in agreement and together we proclaimed, “Amen!” for God had sent a “person of peace” to invite the missionaries into one community. Each community that the missionaries hope to serve with the Gospel will require a “person of peace.”

In order to find God’s “person of peace” missionaries and sending churches need to acknowledge the need for one. They need to pray and build relationships with a receiving church until God sends that person who can invite the missionary into the community they pray for. Don’t stop until it happens. Don’t be content with just finding a faithful Bible student or church attendant. Pray for a “person of peace.” And when God sends that person of peace, nurture that relationship for they are a gift from God. And remember to keep your eyes open for the next “person of peace” opening the way for the next community.

Nurturing the relationships with that person of peace, and even with an ancestor of faith, involves grace, respect and shared authority. Missionaries must include them in ministry decisions. They can not just be there to “rubber stamp” the missionaries’ ideas. They must know that they are an integral part of the mission, and not someone who is being exploited to only further the missionaries’ agenda. They need to be consulted on strategy and their suggestions taken seriously, for God sent them to the mission for a reason. Paternalism will never work when nurturing a relationship with the person of peace or an ancestor of faith.

Part 3: A Missionary Must Nurture Relationships With Their Family.

I have heard it said that a person’s ministry can only go as far as their marriage. God wants to reveal his glory through our family. He wants to reveal his grace, mercy, hope and truth through the family. Even if people don’t listen to the gospel, they can see the Gospel lived out among our family members.

I must confess that I did not spend the time and effort that I should have developing the relationships with my family members. Over the 14 years as a pastor of a “single family” house church, I was just barreling forward with the mission, trusting that the family thing would take care of itself. Julie and I are celebrating our 23^rd year of marriage this year. Our kids are relating to us. We are a family. We love each other. But we never directly focused on marriage development. It was all ministry activities, every day. We didn’t have the support and counsel of a local receiving church. We had occasional talks with the pastor of our sending church. We never went to marriage retreats. We never really talked about family things. We simply remained true to our mission. Mission took precedence over family. We called each other co-worker and our family a house church. We felt that as long as we remained true to our mission everything else would fall into place. We also benefited from our Catholic upbringing that emphasized staying married no matter what. There was also the example of people in our church organization who remained married. Though there have been some hard times, God blessed us over the last 23 years.

There is a temptation, among missionaries, to treat their kids as though they already believe in Jesus and as if they accept the mission as their own. I thought this way. I pushed the kids to engage in Bible study and keep the Sunday worship service going each and every week. I was proud that my kids could set up and run a Sunday service all by themselves if they needed. But the kids may not even believe in Jesus. The pushing of the kids to make ministry happen, may turn them off from wanting to come to Jesus. It is also hard to have a Sunday service when there is an unwilling atmosphere in the room. Pushing the kids will make the parents into authoritarian leaders, for without pushing the kids, the ministry probably would not stand. The kids may never want to part of what the parents are doing. The ministry runs the risk of being a one generation ministry.

After 26 years as a shepherd and Bible teacher, one would think that I would be a wonderful counselor. But this is not true. I learned to teach and preach, but not counsel wisely. I am really handicapped at talking to those closest to me. I never focused on nurturing familial relationships. But it is never too late to start, is it? Missionaries, in a cross cultural mission, must nurture relationships with their family members.

The family relationship must be developed. One of the best ways to nurture that relationship is to pray with one another regularly. Take time out to study God’s word together. Serve in the church together. Talk to one another. Look at Ephesians 5:22-33 as Paul talks about the relationship between husband and wife.

“22 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. 25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, 26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. 28 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, 30 because we are members of his body. 31 “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” 32 This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. 33 However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.” (ESV)

The relationship with the kids is important. In a mission, the ideal is for the kids to host visitors and minister with the parents. They can sing, pray, lead the youth group, and a whole host of things. But if the kids don’t want to be part of the mission, it is very difficult serve in a cross cultural context. What happens when the kids don’t want visitors to come over? When they express their dislikes for some people? What about when they remain quiet, held up in their rooms, simply waiting to leave the home? A lot of such things can be avoided if the relationship with the kids is nurtured well. Paul comments on this too in Ephesians 6:1-4…

“Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. ² “Honor your father and mother” (this is the first commandment with a promise), ³ “that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land.” ⁴ Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.” (ESV)

The kids need to be met where they are at with the Lord, and not imposed with unreal demands to serve the ministry, just because the parents have a calling. The kids need to be respected, encouraged and talked to and ministered to according to where they are with the Lord. This will mean a deviation in ministry goals for the single missionary family. It could mean allowing the kids to fellowship with a receiving church. Pray for God’s wisdom.

One missionary asked me, “How is your church strengthening families?” I would say that the family culture is what is different. In the last three years there was one marriage conference. There has been two, “eight session” small group encounters. Putting the priority on marriage is not formally preached all of the time. But the church culture promotes it. There are no guilty feelings about missing a Sunday worship service or taking a vacation. Parents are putting their family first and mission after family as God allows and talking about it freely. The phrase, “being too family centered” is never spoken. The words co-worker and housechuch, when referring to family, are never spoken. People take family vacations. Family is highly honored. And the kids enjoy being in church. There is multigenerational worship and marriages.

In nurturing relationships with the family, I would say “work at it.” Be intentional. Embrace awkwardness. Enter into honest conversations and prayer together as a family. Keep the oneness in your marriage a top priority. Acknowledge that God himself brought you together for a purpose. Open your eyes to see how God is leading your family specifically. There are doors open around you, specifically for you and your family.

Part 4: Conclusion

As missionaries engage in mission, they need to nurture relationship with a “person of peace” and with their family. Without a strong relationship with a person of peace, the mission will always operate on the outside of the culture and community that the missionaries are praying to serve. They will have a sense of failure in their hearts and make unreal demands and expectations on their family and Bible students that God sends. They must pray and keep their eyes open and enter into partnerships with the person of peace, and not just exploitive relationships to advance the mission. With a person of peace the missionaries can penetrate the culture and build a mission serves the people they pray for. Missionaries must also nurture relationships with the family. They can only go as far as the family relationships go. The marriage relationship must be worked on with determination. With a family they can have longevity and be a great Gospel witness among the people they are called to serve.

This far we have reviewed all six missional entities that missionaries must nurture relationships with in order to serve their mission well. They are…

1. Relationships with… a sending church
2. Relationships with… a mission agency
3. Relationships with… a receiving church
4. Relationships with… a missionary team
5. Relationships with… a “person of peace”
6. Relationships with… the family

A concluding, Part 4, will be written to tie everything together and include even some quotes from responses made. God bless.

“The eye cannot say to the hand, “I don’t need you!” And the head cannot say to the feet, “I don’t need you!”

The Christian Church is the body of Christ. All those who receive Jesus as Savior and Lord, by faith, are parts of the body of Christ. The body has many parts. Hands and feet work together. A nose and an eye are both essential. Each part compliments each other and steps in the gap when another part is weak. We like to think of each part of the body as individual Christians, but also, on the macro level, each ministry and missional entity, has essential functions within the body to bring glory to Jesus.  We must respect each part, and even nurture relationships with them, for they are part of the body of Christ utilizing their various gifts to build up the church.

In the development of a mission, there are not just missionaries. There are other missional entities, which work together in unison, to allow the body of Christ to thrive. God desires for all of them to work together. The important thing is to recognize these parts of the body and nurture working relationship with them as we live as servants of Christ. Anything less is neglecting part of the body of Christ and hindering the work of the missionary.

Part 1: Introduction

I propose that the most fruitful path to embark on, as missionaries, is nurturing solid relationships with six missional entities, all of which are part of the body of Christ.

1. Relationships with… a sending church
2. Relationships with… a mission agency
3. Relationships with… a receiving church
4. Relationships with… a missionary team
5. Relationships with… a “person of peace”
6. Relationships with… the family

This paper will define the six areas of relationship building. Our own family experience as a house church will be reflected upon.  The things learned from the current mission to the Canada will added. There will also be some advice on how to nurture the relationships in the six areas.

The first part dealt with the necessity of nurturing relationships with a sending church and a mission agency. This second part will deal with relationship with a receiving church and a missionary team. The third part will expound on the relationships with a person of peace and the family. The point of all this is to share about some ways that missionaries can be strengthened as they follow Jesus. Let’s see.

Part 2: Nurturing Relationships With A Receiving Church.

Missionaries need to nurture relationships with a receiving church. A receiving church is a church that partners in ministry. If you consider the invisible divide that separates the missionaries, from the culture it seeks to serve, then the receiving church is on the other side of that divide, dwelling in the region the missionary is praying to minister. They are poised to receive the missionaries as they land in the field. That is why I call them, the “receiving church”.

I would include spiritual mentors and advisors as part of the receiving church. They are like-minded with similar vision for mission. They may not even be the same denomination as the sending church. They may not even have a relationship with the mission agency. The prime quality is that they are established within the foreign culture, or subculture, and can lend a helping hand to the missionary.

A receiving church is a separate missional entity that God has brought into the lives of the missionaries. They provide local resources. They provided easily accessible counseling, mentoring, logistic expertise, practical and material support, housing, transportation, friendship, timely feedback, and advice, to name a few. They become the new home church for the missionaries. They are the not the final landing place, but a launching pad to more remote locales. The missionaries become members and serve in the church, but set their eyes on other more “remote” regions.

A receiving church provides a source of support for the family. Let’s face it… we are human. There will be family strife. How hard it is to deal with that all alone! How wonderful it is to have the wisdom and support of a local receiving church! There can be marriage counseling and parenting counseling. The kids can find support in the youth group and youth counselors. There are families who have gone on before. These are only things that a receiving church could provide. We sure would have benefited from the support of receiving church rather than just silently bearing the relational struggles by ourselves as we carried on with our mission. A lot of issues could have been solved if I had nurtured a relationship with a receiving church within the community I lived in, right from the beginning.  (More on family in part 3.)

Sometimes a sending church tries to act like a receiving church. I would not advise this. There is no way that they can fulfill the functions of the receiving church, for the receiving church must be local, easily accessible and nestled in the culture.

In order to respect the work of the receiving church, the sending church must relinquish some control of the “their” missionaries and allow them to participate in the life of the receiving church. This requires faith and trust in God.

I feel that our sending church was trying to fulfill the functions of both a sending church and a receiving church at the same time, ignoring the need for a local receiving church. There are draw backs to this. Our sending church was one hour drive away.  In order for us to go for a simple visit, required 2 1/2 hours of driving and 2 or 3 hours of visiting time.  This meant a simple visit required five hours and $30 in gas and tolls. Visits were infrequent. It was not easy with a family where both parents worked and five young kids needed our attention. There was also, almost “no feed back” in our attempts at ministry.  Maybe I wasn’t ready to accept feedback. Maybe they did this out of respect for me and my choices, but having no feedback made me feel like I was operating in a vacuum. I would have liked more “real time” feed back, more availability for quick visits with other Christians and more advice on fruitful alternatives to mission, born out of casual conversation with members of a local receiving church.

Entering into a relationship with a receiving church is an act of God. Three years ago, while trying to embrace the mission to Canada, we were led to a receiving church after making many “cold calls” and interviewing people over the phone. One person directed me to another. God worked through this and by his sovereignty, led us to a particular congregation. Several visits were made and it became clear that our churches needed to enter into partnership so as to unleash the missionaries.

I completely ignored a relationship with a receiving church. In starting a campus house church (in1998), we lacked any type of relationship with a receiving church. We never thought we needed one. In our pride we launched into this campus mission, ignoring Christians around us. Our town is full of sincere Christians and churches that might have partnered with us. Our campus even had fourteen Christian groups that we might have formed friendships with if we thought it a priority. After moving to our small town, the intensity of our lives kept us from forming meaningful relationships in mission, with other Christians for fourteen years. We made excuses for not building relationships with other churches, because we were too busy serving our own mission according to our “special” calling.  This paradigm of mission kept us isolated from the rest of Christendom and operating without local mentors, supporters and guides.

Without a receiving church I lacked having Christians my own age to hang out with as friends. I was always surrounded by people who were my Bible students. There was always a mission related agenda defining my relationships. I was always evaluating people. Did they have a potential to grow as a disciple or was serving them a waste of my time? I did not have a local spiritual mentor in the same community to “bounce things off of”. I lacked a sense of community with other Christians near me.

With no receiving church, I made unreal demands on my own family members in order to keep the basics of church. We needed singers, prayer representatives, speakers and me, the messenger. There was no one else to do it and so my family needed to. The kids were forced into ministry, even when they did not believe in Jesus and even when they had no personal calling. The mission had to go on. With no receiving church, there was no outlet.

With no receiving church there was no source of “insider wisdom.” Each community is a unique culture. There are things to learn. There is wisdom to help a missionary to navigate the community. Why was I so proud to think that I could function in campus ministry without the wisdom of a receiving church near the campus and without local mentors to help show the way?

Without the receiving church there is no accountability.  If a person does not have a relationship with someone, on a day-to-day basis, it is hard to know and understand what a person is going through. I had slight accountability with my sending church 60 miles away, but as long as I produced positive reports about the mission and was keeping the Sunday worship service, all seemed well.  Nobody knew my need for spiritual mentors. I didn’t even know my need. Nobody knew the extent of my inner struggles.

At the end of my fourteen year stint as a single family house church, I reached out to a local pastor. I attended some his services by myself. I received his counsel. It was actually quite relieving. Healing was on the horizon. I would have avoided a whole lot of heartache if I had nurtured a relationship with a receiving church, right from the beginning of our mission.

Now that I am a member of a local community church (since 2012), how nice it is to stop by Starbucks and see one or two people whom I go to church with. How great it is to attend a home group meeting, where you are not forcing our immediate family members to make things happen. How refreshing it is to just enjoy sweet fellowship with a body of believers with no mission agenda. How nice it is to have some solid marriage and family support in a church that emphasizes family over mission. How good it is to have Christian peers and mentors nearby and not just Bible students.

Any missionary who tries to engage in cross cultural ministry without nurturing a strong relationship with a receiving church will suffer. Having no receiving church does not lend itself to a joyful life of faith, integration into the culture, nor longevity on the mission field. It will be a friendless, lonely mission. It will benefit a missionary greatly to come alongside a receiving church and nurture that relationship. All we have to do is open our eyes to see the receiving church God has prepared right before our eyes.  You might be surprised on who it is. Be ready to come alongside, even they are not like yourself.

Part 3:  Nurturing Relationships With A Missionary Team.

Missionaries, in a cross cultural setting, must have a close relationship with the missionary team. The mission agency, for the Canada mission, really emphasizes the importance of teamwork. They will not encourage missionaries to go out without forming a close team.

Without a team, what is left is a single family serving as missionaries. As I have mentioned before, in such a case, the family members become the pillar leaders of anything that goes on.

There is unrelenting pressure for the husband to always have the Sunday message prepared.

There is pressure for the kids to always have praise and worship music prepared (even when they do not believe in Jesus).

There is pressure for the wife to do everything else.

It may take years, if ever, to have a non-family member take ownership of the ministry. The family must always uphold ministry activities, without fail. Some parts of ministry should not have been formed in the first place because of the lack of team members. Without team members there are no one to share the load.

But with a team there is support. There is feedback. There is sharing of the load. Other team members can stand in the gap. They can encourage one another in times of weakness. There can be elders, differing approaches, checks and balances. What about being able to go on furlough? Who will take over when you are gone? It must be the other members of the team that you have nurtured relationships with. It is a great relief to be part of a missionary team.

In a missionary team there is oneness and respect. Some churches may be tempted to embed a senior missionary in with other junior missionaries. They may have a godly motive to infuse some spiritual maturity in the team.  But they may also have an impure motive to make sure the church’s agenda is fulfilled. This is paternalistic. It does not trust the leading of the Holy Spirit. It does not respect the team members. In the team there is respect and shared authority, admiration and opportunities for all members to contribute. There is trust in God. With a missionary team there could be consensus building and unity.

We suffered greatly because we took hold of our mission without being part of a team. Our family members were the team. There was no one to pinch hit for me in leading group Bible study and delivering the Sunday message. It was always me and it was stressful. The kids were under pressure to always contribute with a smile on their face. Sunday became a chore instead a time of joyful worship before the Lord. Things would be very different with a team.

Without a team, the nature of the ministry was authoritarian. I was the head of the household. I was the one making sure that our “well oiled” machine kept running every week. I was authoritarian. I was the enforcer, and I did it for over 14 years. There were no checks and balances to see if I was straying as a leader. My wife was forced to play that role. A missionary who does not have a strong relationship with a missionary team will end up making unreal demands on each member of their family to keep their mission alive.

A missionary can nurture a relationship with the missionary team, by keeping in communication. They do not operate on their own. They work in conjunction with the team. They submit to God’s leading as revealed through the team. There is oneness. There is openness and honesty and commitment. There is communista (bonding from shared experiences).

Longevity, joy, fruitfulness on the mission field can be achieved by nurturing a strong relationship with a missionary team.

Part 4: Conclusion.

God never meant for us to function with no other relationships with the local body of believers around us. Elijah felt all alone. He was so distressed that he was hoping to die. But God told him, in the depth of his despair, “Yet I reserve seven thousand in Israel—all whose knees have not bowed down to Baal and whose mouths have not kissed him” (1 Ki 19:18; NIV). Elijah was not alone. There were others in the spiritual battle. God wants us to partner with others. In Phil 1:5-8 Paul writes, “I thank my God every time I remember you. 4 In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy 5 because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now, 6 being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” He considered others as partnering with him for the sake of the Gospel. This partnering involves individuals but Christians in other missional entities, like a receiving church and a missionary team.

We may be tempted to ignore relationships with other parts of the body of Christ as we barrel forward with our mission. It seems easier, at first to ignore a need for a receiving church or other team members. But, by failing to nurture these relationships, missionaries suffer. Their mission can only go so far. When I tried to do it, for fourteen years, I was left severely depressed and despaired. I was lonely and without local peers, local Christian friends and local mentors. I forced my family to serve the functions that a receiving church and a team was meant to fulfill.

Some may have thought I should have suffered for several years longer, keeping business as usual, and thinking blessing was just over the next mountain. But I don’t think so. Never again will I ignore these important relationships in mission, rather I will promote their need and seek to nurture them.

Part three of this three part series will discuss nurturing relationships with a “person of peace’” and the family.

“But as it is, God arranged the members in the body, each one of them, as he chose. ¹⁹ If all were a single member, where would the body be? ²⁰ As it is, there are many parts,yet one body.” (ESV)

The Christian Church is the body of Christ. All those who receive Jesus as Savior and Lord, by faith, are parts of the body of Christ. There is only one true, invisible Church of Jesus Christ. The body has many parts. Each person, even each organization, in the body has something essential to do to build up the whole church. Each works in unison to bring glory to Christ. And so it is with the development of missions. There are not just missionaries. There are other missional entities, which work together in unison to allow the Great Commission to move forward. God desires for all of them to work together. The important thing is to recognize these parts of the body and nurture working relationship with them.

Part 1: Introduction

There are multiple approaches on how people attempt to live as cross cultural missionaries. Each approach has its pros and cons. Some approaches lead to lasting, godly fruit, overflowing joy and no regrets. Other approaches lead to emptiness, depression and nagging feelings of “it might have been”, with a myriad of variations in between. I propose that the most fruitful path to embark on, as missionaries, is nurturing solid relationships with six missional entities. Working toward anything less will hinder a mission’s progress. The six areas of relationships are as follows:

1. Relationships with… a sending church
2. Relationships with… a mission agency
3. Relationships with… a receiving church
4. Relationships with… a missionary team
5. Relationships with… a “person of peace”
6. Relationships with… the family

These six areas were not derived from a text book. They were experienced by my involvement as a house church leader in a campus mission organization (1998-2012) and as a church liaison and networker for my current church’s mission to the First Nation people in northern Canada. Some of the terms originate from terminology learned from those involved in “To Every Tribe” Mission agency. I was first inspired by the different components of missions after attending an “Ekballo” Missions Conference, sponsored by “To Every Tribe” at Northern Illinois University in 2013.

God has been revealing so many wonderful things, in regards to mission, over the last three years and I seek to share that with others. Especially to single missionaries and single families serving as missionaries. This paper will discuss the six areas of relationship building. They will be defined. Our own family experience as a house church will be reflected upon. The things learned from the current mission to the Canada will added. There will also be some advice on how to nurture the relationships in the six areas.

This paper is lengthy. I will present it in three parts, so as to be more readily digestible. The first part will deal with a sending church and a mission agency. The second will deal with relationship with a receiving church and a missionary team. The third will expound on the relationships with a person of peace and the family. The point of all this is not to point fingers. It is to share about some ways that missionaries can be strengthened as they follow Jesus. It will reveal options. It will open doors to paradigm shifts in some peoples’ approaches to missions. I was blessed through this and so why not others? Let’s see.

Part 2: Background

I feel I have a tiny bit of experience attempting in to live as a missionary. Though I never left the country, I headed up a single family house church for fourteen years in the context of campus mission. After you stop laughing at that statement, think about the campus as a sub culture within our society. Many of the students are internationals. The students are a mosaic of social tribes. We operated as “stand alone” single family house church with no affiliation with any other local church. Our affiliations were with a international missionary organization that had other campus ministries in the Chicago-land area. Julie and I were no longer students. We were workers, pushing forty. We were not single students, but parents trying to raise five kids without a local church body or extended family. We were growing increasingly out of touch with students, whose culture changes once every three years. In that sense we were engaged in a cross cultural mission, within a subculture in our society. The demands upon us were not as vigorous as the demands on missionaries who are actually living outside their country, but there are some similarities that I could glean experience from and share with you.

In our fourteen years of engaging in a single family, house church ministry, I can say that we ignored several areas of mission support. We had a sending church (a one hour drive away). We had a sending church trying to be a mission agency and a receiving church at the same time. We did not have a missionary team, for we were a single family. We did not have a “person of peace” inviting us into the campus community. We also ignored nurturing relationships within our own family. We basically ignored several relationships, thinking that all we had to do was staff a small, single family house church, by faith, and God would bless it and fill it with eager, growing disciples.

It was like building a baseball diamond, placing my family as players and attempting play a baseball game, week after week, thinking people would eventually join us, filling the pews, forming teams and a league, like the dream of Kevin Costner in the 1989 movie “Field of Dreams”: If you build it, they will come…NOT!!!!!!

Over the fourteen years, we were blessed in so many ways, but at the same time there grew a bitter legacy of depression, fatalism, and despair in my heart. Much of it was attributed to the fact that we ignored several areas of relationship building in the mission field. That being said, I want to reflect on the deleterious affects that occurred by ignoring certain relationships in the overall mission and the positive affects of engaging in nurturing the relationships. This first section will deal with nurturing relationships with a sending church and a mission agency.

Part 3: Nurturing Relationships With A Sending Church.

Developing a good relationship with a sending church is essential for the success of any missionary endeavor. A sending church is a congregation who answered the call of God to send missionaries to preach the gospel and raise disciples in another community. They try their best, to support the missionaries. A sending church may be located in the same city, or it could be on the other side of the planet. They could be sending missionaries to the same culture or into a cross cultural setting. I would include financial donors and missionary support groups as part of the sending church.

From our experience as a house church, I would advise any missionary family to stay near their sending church until a very close working relationship forms. Our sending church was a one hour drive away. We had a good relationship with them. I was living among church members for eight years prior to starting a house church. We were part of the greater organization since 1986. Relationships with the sending congregation were strong. Even after starting a house church in 1998, we traveled three times a week for three more years, before becoming an independent house church. They offered regular Bible study, 24/7 open channels of communication and ministry resources on request. They would send helpers to ministry projects, send representatives to Gospel outreach events, and include us in the leadership of twice-yearly Bible conferences and Bible schools. They supplied items at the formation of our house church, like chairs and hymn books, etc. They provided continuing education. They provided kids’ ministry. They prayed for us and still do. We had the backing and practical support of the entire congregation. They tried their best to be a sending church and we benefitted greatly. After ending the house church three years ago, I can say that I am free to call, visit and to receive any type of mission resource.

Missionaries should not just join a congregation in an attempt to make them into their sending church. The relationships have to be there. To simply starting attending a church, without building the long term relationships, is like dipping your fishing pole into an “over fished” fishing pond. There must be relationships. The congregation and the missionaries must be like family. This takes years of drawing near and serving the Lord together. For us, it was eleven years.

The missionaries I am serving with now have spent several years, building relationships with their sending churches. They are participating in ministry. They teach Sunday school, lead the youth group, go on mission trips, and preach occasionally. They serve the Lord, within their sending churches. The sending church needs to feel that the missionaries are part of their church family. It must be the goal of every missionary appointee to nurture that relationship.

Part 4: Nurturing Relationships With A Mission Agency.

A mission agency is an organization that includes people from different denominations. It is headed up by seasoned missionary veterans. They provide missionary training and education from a particular Christian theological perspective. They provide short term mission experiences. They provide ongoing missionary education and support on the mission field. They help in fundraising and managing the missionary’s income sources. They promote the missionary endeavors and also engage in recruitment. They nurture relationships with the sending church. They seek to strengthen the missionary team. They keep missionaries and supporters informed about the mission. There is a myriad of things that a mission’s agency does.

The following are statements taken from the “To Every Tribe” Missions Agency that describe what they do. (http://www.toeverytribe.org/ ) They are a mission agency that adheres to reformed theology. From these excerpts one can get a sense of the role of a mission agency.

Mission

To Every Tribe’s Center for Pioneer Church Planting (CPCP) endeavors to train and mentor cross-cultural missionaries for the remaining unreached regions where there is still no grace, no gospel, and no name for Jesus Christ.

To Every Tribe exists to extend the worship of Christ among all peoples by mobilizing the church, training disciplemakers, and sending missionary teams to plant churches among the unreached.

Church Planting

We seek to train obedience-oriented disciples who make other disciples in planting indigenous churches that are self-led, self-supporting, self-theologizing, and self-reproducing.

Pre-Field Training

We invest in extensive theological and missiological pre-field training of missionaries to equip them to thrive on the field and to enhance their ability to plant healthy churches.

Team Ministry

We are committed to ministry through communities of believers where individual gifts work together for the good and effectiveness of the whole, and model the body of Christ to unbelievers.

Distinctives

The 60/40 blend of in-class and on-the-job training exercises makes the CPCP unique in its missionary training philosophy. The CPCP is distinctive in its combined commitment to:

BIBLICAL THEOLOGY We are committed to a reformed, baptistic understanding of Scripture.

UNREACHED PEOPLES Our training is specifically designed for those wanting to be prepared for pioneer evangelism and church planting in remote regions of Mexico and Papua New Guinea.

TEAM MINISTRY Pioneer church planting is physically, emotionally, and spiritually demanding. It is most effectively carried out by a healthy team approach to ministry. A significant part of the CPCP training is to equip missionaries to be a part of successful church planting teams.

ON-THE-JOB TRAINING We provide experience. It is our belief that church planters cannot be adequately trained in a traditional classroom alone. We intentionally create practical cross-cultural training situations in both Mexico and Papua New Guinea.

PERSONAL MENTORING The CPCP is not interested in merely informing your mind, but transforming your character and abilities into experiential, cross-cultural know-how.

MAKING DISCIPLES Pioneer church planting begins with making disciples. CPCP interns will develop strategies to bring the gospel to communities in the Rio Grande Valley with the goal of establishing new believers in the faith and equipping them to make new disciples.

The Center for Pioneer Church Planting (CPCP) provides a unique missionary training experience. Missionary Trainees receive classroom teaching led by biblical and missiological experts from across the country.

Combined with on-the-field experience, these courses equip our trainees with the knowledge and experience required for long-term, cross-cultural church planting success.

Link to the courses they offer people in the two year experience.

http://www.toeverytribe.org/cpcp/missionary-training-courses/

Link to recruitment

http://www.toeverytribe.org/missionary-sending-agency/missionary-opportunities/

In our house church experience, we lacked the presence of a mission agency. I would say that our sending church, and affiliated churches, attempted to act as a mission agency also. They tried their best to provide mission specific education at staff meetings, Bible studies, theological education, special lectures, mission relevant speakers at conferences. They tried to facilitate people to visit other nations, by attending international Bible conferences and arranging short term mission events. People were informed of our mission. They prayed for us. There was no need for fundraising or money management for we were a self supporting. They were trying their best to function as a mission agency without actually being a formal mission agency. But was this the best paradigm and did they succeed in functioning as a mission agency at all?

By a federation of sending churches, trying to act as a mission agency at the same time, it failed to fulfill the function of a mission agency all together. We lacked the support, the recruitment, and the education. Only leaders, who have been serving in the ministry over 10 years, and demonstrated commitment, received occasional campus-relevant education. There attempts to support were thread bare. To receive some of these benefits required years of sacrifice, such as driving long distances, attending staff conferences in far away cities, and spending long hours away from home, when there was work, ministry and young kids to raise. Recruitment was non existent if you weren’t serving on a top 20 American campus. American leaders, converts, who were laboring on various campus’, were not considered good prospects to join with. Their campus’ were undesirable to be part of. At our campus, we actually lost hope of ever having long term missionaries joining the mission, even though we were the fruit of “decades long” prayers.

The sending church, even a federation of sending churches, should be separate from the mission agency. Being a mission agency takes a full time effort in order to be effective. Even “To Every Tribe” does not try to do everything and seeks to partner with sending churches and missionary teams, knowing that it takes such relationships to fulfill the mission.

There needs to be a separation, as a way to have checks and balances. The early church had six main centers. They were all considered equals. A church has an elder board that is separate from the pastor. Can you image our government, if the senate, congress, judiciary and the presidential office were not separate entities? They are separate but they all work together. It is the wisdom of God to keep everything separate and yet working together as one. When the mission agency is separate they can dedicate themselves to what they do best. In this way, the missionaries don’t feel that their education and support is threadbare, but comprehensive.

A missionary can nurture relationships with a mission agency, by submitting to its leadership. They can comply with instructions and the mandate of the agency, while at the same time working together the other missional bodies. They can keep in communication with the agency. They can make regular visits to the agency to share their experiences with new students.

In conclusion, I can say that our family had a good relationship with our sending church, but we tried to function without a mission agency. I propose that a missionary needs to build strong, family-like relationships with their sending church. This needs to be nurtured, because success on the field is related to the support the missionary receives back home. The missionary needs to also build relationships with a mission agency. It is a separate organization, dedicated to building up the missionary and their family. It should be separate so that the support the missionary receives is not threadbare and exclusive but comprehensive and inclusive to all involved in the mission, not just leaders exhibiting total dedication for over a decade. Next paper will deal with relationship with a receiving church and a missionary team.

…And Instead Dwell In Christ

Admin note: Reading Kevin’s testimony, I immediately resonated with what he shared below. I know that the Christian life should be full of love, joy and peace (Gal 5:22), as well an overflowing and abundant life (Jn 10:10b). But after a quarter of a century as a Christian, I was experiencing anger, joylessness and anything but peace–perhaps like Kevin after 26 years of “endless self-pruning” as a Christian, as he vividly shares in Part 2: Lost in my human efforts to love God. The Christian life felt to me very much like such a torturous unbearable drag. At that time I didn’t quite know why. But I knew that I needed to seriously re-evaluate my life as a Christ-follower…and make major drastic changes if I were to restore my joy of intimacy with my Lord. See if you can relate to Kevin pouring out his heart in what he shares below.

Deuteronomy 6:5, “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength” (NIV).

Mark 12:30, “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength” (NIV).

Deuteronomy 6 discusses ways in which, we, as believers, can guard our hearts when we are on the cusp of abundant blessings from God. The Israelites were about to enter the Promised Land, and receive houses and fields that were not theirs. A former slave people would become a nation. On the brink of receiving many blessings, they were in danger of losing their hearts to the world and drifting away from the God who saved them.

For any believer, it is when we are being blessed by God, that we are the most vulnerable in losing our hearts to the temptations of this world. We could end up following the idols of the culture in which we live. We could forget the Lord. We could loose a thankful heart and take all of our blessings for granted. We could even become proud, thinking that all of the blessings we have accumulated actually were procured exclusively by our own “human” efforts. In doing this we end up giving glory to ourselves and not to Christ, who is the actual source of our blessings. Our love for our Savior can grow cold.

Anyway, we know that we must guard our hearts, for God’s blessings are being poured out on us continuously. We are so blessed. We live in one of the most blessed countries of the world. We are living in the most blessed generation. We have freedom of religion and freedom of thought and expression. The greatest blessing is yet to come, the resurrection from the dead into life everlasting in the Kingdom of Heaven where we will live with our Savior Jesus, face to face. But, as a result, we are the most vulnerable generation. We Christians, must make it a point to guard our hearts.

How? Dt 6:5 says, “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength.” Mk 12:30 says. “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.” I will explore each aspect of devotion, to love the Lord with all of our heart, mind, soul and strength. Then I will explore the dangers of continuously trying, with our own human efforts, to become more efficient in showing love for Jesus, verses simply being found in Christ, through faith, and allowing the God, the Eternal Gardener, to prune and perfect our expressions of love to Christ. This will be illuminated by my personal testimony.

Part 1: Suggestions On How To Better Love God: But Be Warned!

People have been endowed by God, with various tools to love the Lord. They can be found in the following verses:

“Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength” (Dt 6:5).

“Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength” (Mk 12:30).

God has given us heart, mind, soul and strength. He has given us these characteristics to love him. He has given us the direction to love him intensity, using these qualities, so as to guard our hearts and protect and nurture our relationship with him, especially in the vulnerable time when we are on the cusp of great blessings.

But be warned, trying to apply these teachings, without having a “vine and branch relationship” (Jn 15:5) with Jesus Christ, can make a person into a disciplined disciple who is depressed and devoid of joy and laughter, limited in their ability to exalt the name of Jesus. With this in mind, we will explore different ways to love God in the modern context. Keep in mind… this is not a check list on how to become more efficient in our walk with the Lord. It is not a blueprint on how to self prune ourselves of our useless branches. It is an ideal that could inspire us as we follow Christ.

First, loving God with all of our heart: A person’s heart is the seat of their passions. We give our hearts to many things. Young people give their hearts to their friends, to music and self improvement. They achieve great things when they give their hearts. Adults give their hearts to their hobbies, families and pursuit of their dreams. They too can achieve great things. Loving God with all of our heart, is loving God with all of our passion. How can we do this? What we are passionate about comes naturally. It is unique for every person. Our passions are somehow related to our giftings. God can redeem our passions and use what we are passionate about, for his glory. Or, a person can do what doesn’t come naturally…forcing their passions to be in line with what they think is loving God. I would not suggest this. This will lead to joylessness.

Second, loving God with all of our soul: We have two components to our being, body and soul. The soul is made in the image of God. With the soul we can commune with God. We can relate to God. We can love God and we can worship God. Loving God with all of our soul means that we worship God. We nurture our relationship with God as we worship, revere and adore him. Loving God with all of our soul is something that spontaneously erupts. It is a response to an encounter with Jesus. It is a result of experiencing God’s grace. We can encourage worship to happen, by joining in worship with the local congregation or a church meeting. But ultimately it is God that causes our soul to overflow with worship and praise. Forcing ourselves to worship him can only go so far.

Third, loving God with all of our mind: Our mind is very powerful. When humans begin to pursue something with their minds, nothing seems impossible. Even extending human life to 200 years, resurrecting a mastodon, or starting a colony on Mars seems possible. Once the mind starts to pursue a topic, it is hard for us to get it out of our minds. There are those who can’t put down a 700 page book until it is completed. Others pursue a hypothesis until they uncover the truth. We can love God with all of our mind. We can read books about God. We can develop mission fields with its many systems and networks with our minds. We can write about God and spiritual life. We can imagine the Kingdom of God and what great things the Gospel will bring to a people group, with our minds. In an attempt to love God, we can discipline our minds to think about Christ honoring things. We can discipline ourselves to engage in daily devotionals etc. But, we can also burn ourselves out, denying our mind to dwell on what it has a passion for and forcing a round block into a square hole for too long.

Fourth, loving God with all of our strength: People have a lot of strength to do things with. We can apply our strength to loving God. God gives us the strength. He inspires us, and loves us, hopes in us. This inspiration, hope and love gives us more strength. We can focus our strength to love Jesus. For example some people get up at 5 am to ensure they have time for devotionals. They sacrifice sleep in order to engage in a mission. We can muster strength to read a spiritual book. We can get a degree in Christian ministry. We can shed useless things in our lives in order go further with the strength we have been given. This is where the danger lies. A person may get so focused on shedding “the baggage” in order to muster more strength to love God, that they actually forget about God. Without a vine and branch relationship with Jesus, they become disciplined in spiritual things but lose the full life that Christ would have for them. The end result is a joyless, yet efficient, life of faith. This is where we fall into burnout if we are not careful. And this brings me to my own testimony.

Part 2: Lost In My Human Efforts To Love God

Now is the time to talk about the dangers of trying to be more and more efficient in our loving God using our own efforts. Out of a deep sincerity of heart, we try to become more disciplined, as we self-prune ourselves, to get rid of few more useless branches from our lives. We try to excise a little more selfishness and self serving tendencies, in order to devote ourselves to our mission, which we equate with loving God. Maybe we could squeeze out a little more offering, devote a little more prayer time, introduce a little more Bible reading, make sure that there is less time for ourselves and our “selfish” pursuits and more time for Jesus and his mission. All of this is done in our sincere quest to love God with all of our hearts, minds, soul and strength.

I operated like this for 26 years, all the while ignoring the importance of dwelling in Christ and finding my peace and rest in him. I largely ignored the truth of being still and knowing that God is control. This way of life helped me to be disciplined and to find my giftings in the Lord, but it also took a great toll on me.

Over the course of two and a half decades, I become very devoted to my mission in the church. So devoted that some days I would sleep for 4-5 hours a day, occasionally having to stop and take a nap in my car. After working all night, I would be up at 2 pm to meet students for Bible study at 230 pm. For over 5 years, I would memorize 10-30 Bible verses every two weeks and write a four page testimonial and travel 140 miles (there and back) to join a meeting. I would leave at 9am and get back at 7pm. I would study the Bible with about six people per week on a 1:1 basis each week. I would write a message weekly and deliver it on Sunday. Every two weeks I would do the Sunday thing with only three hours of sleep. There was a huge expenditure of money. Above tithing, there were conference fees and travel fees and the paying of two mortgages for a few years, one for our home and the other for a church house. On Sunday there were three Bible studies with the kids after the Sunday worship service. All of this was happening, after working full time and raising five kids with my wife. They activities varied over the years, but the intensity of it all carried on for 26 years. At the end of it all, I was running like a machine. I got this way from attempting to cut off one useless branch after another, becoming more efficient in expressing my love for God while ignoring the relationship with Jesus Christ.

The result of this kind of drive for efficiency was both good and bad. The good thing was that I did get to know Jesus better. I got to know my Bible. I grew to be a 1:1 Bible teacher. I could become a Christian mentor. I could lead group Bible studies. I could write and deliver Gospel messages. I could relate to other Christian leaders and work together with them. I prayed. I could write reports about the work of God. I could slowly grow to be a writer and a devotional writer. I could be a networker in the work of God. I could promote missionary support groups.

I am very thankful for these skills that God bestowed. They provide me with the tools I will use, as I serve the Lord Jesus, throughout my entire lifetime, even into the twilight of my life…even in a nursing home, I can serve Jesus with these tools. They are meaningful tools that are bringing about lasting fruit in my life. This is because of Jesus Christ, and the disciplines that I experienced while growing as a disciple and pruning useless branches.

But then there were the bad things. I was very efficient but largely joyless. Years ago I remember being attracted to Afro-American Gospel music and Southern Gospel music. I liked these genres of Christian music because they were full of joy. They were not full of joy, because of the number of people coming to an outreach event, or the numbers of disciples engaged in ministry. They were singing about the Kingdom of God and the Resurrection. They were sincerely celebrating life everlasting with the Lord Jesus forever and ever. Something that I knew about, but was not doing.

And then there was Jn 1:4 that I could not ignore. This verse reads, “In him was life, and that life was the light of all mankind.” And also John 10:10, “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.” These verses continually knocked on the door of my heart. In Jesus is Life. This life is the light of all mankind. Jesus came to bring life. He came to grant us life to the full. I could not give testimony to these statements. I was not experiencing this life, nor life to the full, and yet I was sincerely trying to follow Jesus for 26 years! Though I was getting super efficient, I was depressed, without laughter, with momentary episodes of joy, and strained relationships. I doubted that anyone would ever choose to follow Christ, by looking at my life. What I was portraying was more, endless “boot camp” training than life in Christ.

In regards to ministry, did such a lifestyle bring about a larger church? Did it attract people to our fellowship? Did it attract missionaries to voluntarily gather to preach the Gospel together? Did it create a fellowship where joy in the Lord was overflowing? Did it create more Bible teachers and spiritual mentors? Did it inspire others to follow what I was doing? No.

After 26 years of trying to make myself more and more efficient in loving God, I saw no prospects for change, operating in that paradigm. Some would have me think that if I just suffered a little longer then the dams of God’s blessing would burst open. I didn’t believe that. Nor do I now. I knew that things would only remain the same, endless self pruning and refinement. I did believe in the parable of the five loaves and two fish. If I just offered what I had, then God would accept that and multiply it. But I was offering up my five loaves and two fish for twenty six years and I was left depressed. Once a thought crossed my mind, “What if I need to offer up my five loaves and two fish” more intensely and sincerely? Maybe then God would bless. When I shared this with a brother in Lord, he laughed. He saw the folly of my legalistic way of thinking. I was really stuck. No one was telling me I was wrong. I appeared to be devoted to the mission and appeared to be loving God with all my strength. But Jesus, seeing, my need, broke the chains himself.

Part 3: The Dawn Of A New Day

Jn 1:4 and Jn 10:10 resounded in my heart. If Jesus came to give us life to the full, then why was I not experiencing life to the full, even after streamlining my efforts for 26 years! I was stuck in a rut. I knew something was missing but didn’t know what. I was hard hearted. But God led me along a painful awakening in 2012 until now. Along this leg of the journey, I came to discover what it means to dwell in the Lord.

Jn 15:5 reads, “I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.”

I learned about resting in the Lord and taking the unique yolk that Jesus has for me and my life and my family in this season of living…the Missio Dei in my life.

Mt 11:28-30 reads, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

I learned about being still and knowing that God is control.

Ps 46:10 reads, “He says, ‘Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.’”

Over the last three years Jesus has taught me that loving God with all of my heart, mind, soul and strength, has nothing to do with endless refining and pruning myself to be more efficient. It has everything to do with remaining in Jesus. It has everything to do with allowing God to bear what he wants in my life, in his time and in his way, and not forcing the issue. There is life in Jesus, to be certain. There is life to the FULL in him. There is the fruit if joy, peace and love, but that is not found in self pruning one’s self for decades. It is an outpouring of our relationship with Christ.

Jn 4:14, “but whoever drinks the water I give them will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give them will become in them a spring of water welling up to eternal life.”

I thank God for each leg of my life’s journey thus far. God has grown me into the man I am today. God willing, I will still have 50 more years to serve my Lord Jesus in this world. (That is if I live to 100!) I thank God for his gifts and his blessings and the missions he has called me to. It is now time to enter into the next season of my life and ministry and it not going to be marked by endless self pruning and streamlining of my expressions of love to the Lord. I will be more concerned about having a vine and branch relationship with Jesus. I will, by the grace of God, dwell in his love and allow him to bear his fruit in my life and family. I will allow him to exalt his name through my life. And I will enjoy the life to the full that Christ gives. I will bear testimony to the world, that in Jesus is life, true life and we can have life to the full by faith. I have a great hope that endless, God-honoring fruit will be born. It is God who will nurture and blossom love in my heart, allowing me to love him with intensity. No more endless refinement and self pruning, only remaining in Christ and trusting him.

“ But by the grace of God I am what I am, and his grace to me was not without effect. No, I worked harder than all of them—yet not I, but the grace of God that was with me. “ (NIV)

This is for all those who preached grace and talked grace, but held onto some forms of legalism in the deep crevices of their hearts. This is my story and I pray it may set free, someone who was struggling as I was. This one is for you!

2 Samuel 22: 21-25 reads, “The Lord dealt with me according to my righteousness; according to the cleanness of my hands he rewarded me. 22 For I have kept the ways of the Lord and have not wickedly departed from my God. 23 For all his rules were before me, and from his statutes I did not turn aside. 24 I was blameless before him, and I kept myself from guilt. 25 And the Lord has rewarded me according to my righteousness, according to my cleanness in his sight.” (ESV)

From a young age David set his life toward God. He meant to keep the ways of the Lord and live according to the word of God, trusting that the Lord was faithful to his promises and would credit him with righteousness. When we read this, in this New Testament age, we think that David was sounding a little self righteous with this “According to my righteousness”. “according to the cleanness of my hands”. King David was a great man, but he did sin. And some of sins were ubber serious. But I realize that he can say these things because he received the forgiveness of sins from God. He received the grace of God and that is how he can be declared righteous in the sight of God and that is how he can say that is hands are clean. He could have confidence that he is blameless from God’s point of view and that he has fulfilled all of the law’s demands, only because of God’s grace. David knew this salvation, this justification apart from works. Romans 4:6-9 reads, “just as David also speaks of the blessing of the one to whom God counts righteousness apart from works: 7 “Blessed are those whose lawless deeds are forgiven, and whose sins are covered; 8 blessed is the man against whom the Lord will not count his sin.” (ESV)  It was not something new to King David. Abraham himself was considered righteous by believing, before he was circumcised. (Romans 4:1-12)

As King David could have sought many different kinds of rewards, but for him the greatest reward was being found righteous in God’s sight. Look at verse 25, “And the Lord has rewarded me according to my righteousness, according to my cleanness in his sight.”  What was God’s reward? God’s reward for King David was that he was delivered from the hand of his enemies and that his kingdom was established and upheld. He received the love and forgiveness and the peace of God in his heart. He also knew that his body would not see decay and that he would not be abandoned to the grave, but would experience resurrection and eternal life in the kingdom of God with God, forever. This is the greatest reward and it is given to us, not because of our works, but because of the pure grace of God.

Holding onto the grace of God and knowing that we are justified by the grace of God alone is an imperative. We can not live without it. Over the last few decades of Christian living I knew this and I held onto the grace of God. But there was another part of my heart that held onto salvation by works. I was the type of Christian who quietly and privately held onto legalism while talking about grace. But the effect of this on my life could not be ignored. I felt “right” and accepted by God and my peers if I was always engaged in mission, always doing something positive and related to my mission and calling in my life. If I deviated, even a little, or took some rest, there would be feelings of failure, guilt and fruitless feelings brewing in my heart. If I was not bearing outward fruit in my life, then my solution was to work harder. Maybe I needed to simply reposition my life within the paradigm I was operating in, and from that new vantage point, work harder. If I suffered a few more years doing the same thing and I would somehow make breakthrough. With human effort I tried to keep my “hands clean” and never to turn away from the Lord. I attempted to live a blameless life by obeying what I knew was the law to the Lord, all the while telling the world, “by the grace of God I am what I am.”

What is the end of that verse? “No, I worked harder than all of them. Yet not I, but the grace of God that was within me.” (1 Cor 15:10, NIV) I was operating on the premise that if I had the faith to hold onto the grace of Jesus, then automatically I would work hard, even striving to work as hard as Apostle Paul. I literally ignored “Yet not I, but the grace of God that was within me.” I knew very little the difference between the working hard and the grace of God; the difference between human effort versus divine inspiration; human strength versus spiritual strength. What was the end result of this striving and seeking to be right before God using my human efforts? It was years of depression, anger and frustration, unreal expectations on family members, and joyless Christian living with no relationships with the greater body of Christ. I had no way to be set free. Who do I blame? Myself. I was the leader of a single family house church for 14 years with just me and my family and few Bible students who came and went. I let it happen. For over twenty years, I ignored pieces of the Bible. I thought depression was part of the package of suffering for Christ. I was willing to live in it my secret legalism. I even promoted it.

It took my wife’s courage and “wifely” wisdom to let me know that something was not right. It has been a very tough two years, coming out of my old ways, but by God’s grace I have been digging deep in the crevices of my mind and heart and sweeping away vestiges of legalism. I have been making strides towards understanding more fully, “by the grace of God I am what I am.” and “Yet not I but the grace of God that was within me.”  And even my recurrent nightmares of not measuring up, have gone away, being replaced with dreams of being proactive and overcoming. (That is another story.)

How An Older Christian Can Be An Effective Member In An Intergenerational Mission Team

“A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another” (Jn 13:34-35).

In June 2013, I was blessed to be part of an exploratory team to Northern Canada to explore the feasibility of sending missionaries to the Aboriginal people. There were five of us. Two of the members, the pastor and myself, are in our forties. The other three were in their mid twenties. We were all from the white, middle class suburbia of a Midwest university town nestled in the midst of corn fields. The trip lasted for eight days. We drove together for 15 hours, stayed in hotels, in two cabins, road in a train for 18 hours, and drove home 15 hours. We were in close proximity. We had many things in common, like a common faith in Jesus and a common calling to the North and a desire to serve Christ in the region. But there were differences. There was a generational difference; a difference in our theological training, the pastor has a Phd and heads up a 300 member non-denominational Bible church. I am a lay person in the church having experience in “tent making” and “house church” ministry, and the younger people are Campus Crusade for Christ grads and receiving missionary training at a missions agency. We are different and we would never have to face these differences and grow through them unless we were flung into a mission together, by God. The eight days of being in close proximity was indeed a blessing and a growing experience which I thank God for. I profoundly learned so many lessons about being an older Christian on an intergenerational gospel mission team and I was inspired to share what I learned through my experience. This article will touch upon nine areas that people need to concern about when they become part of such a team. They are:

1. Realize that there is a generational gap;
2. Find God’s will;
3. Be  a team supporter;
4. Serve others;
5. Be ready to sacrifice;
6. Think about the needs of other members in the team;
7. Have a spiritual relationship;
8. Build honest and sincere relationships;
9. Control your sinful nature.

May God establish countless intergenerational Gospel mission teams so that the Gospel of Jesus Christ may spread throughout the world.

Part 1: Biblical Foundation for Operating In an Inter-generational Gospel Team

As a key verse for this article, I chose John 13:34-35. I think this command is the basis for any ongoing team effort to reveal Jesus to an unbelieving world. In this passage, Jesus gave his disciples a new command. “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disci­ples, if you love one another.” (ESV) Until now the disciples had concentrated on their personal relationship with Jesus. Each one had formed an intimate relationship with Jesus. But now it was time for them to learn to love one another. It was time for them to care for one another, overcoming any self-cen­ter­edness. Jesus wanted them to love one another as he had loved them. This is the power source of loving other believers that we are called to work with.

It was not easy to love each other. The disciples had come from varied backgrounds. They were from different age groups. They had different preferences and pet peeves. They were living in close proximity for over three years. It might have been very hard to learn to love one another. Peter and John competed with each other to receive Jesus’ love and to be recognized as leaders. They would both have to learn how to humble themselves to love the other person and build him up. Matthew the tax collector and Simon the Zealot were natural adversaries. But Simon would have to learn to curb his patriotism and Matthew would have to learn how to sacrifice for the sake of others. How could they possibly learn to love one another? The key…remembering Jesus and how he had loved each of them.

Jesus’ command to “Love one another” is not an option as a Christian. They had to struggle to love one another as an absolute command of Jesus. In other words, in any circumstance they had to love one another. We live in a generation that is motivated by feelings. Many people are will­ing to love others when they feel love in their hearts. But we cannot obey Jesus’ command only when we feel like it. We must obey this com­mand even when we don’t feel like it.

By loving each other with God’s love, all people will know that they are disciples of Jesus. When the love of Jesus circulated within and among them, they could have Jesus in their midst and thus reveal Jesus’ love to the world. Even though Je­sus would not be with them in the flesh, the Spirit of Jesus, which mani­fests the holy love of God, would be with them. The Spirit of Jesus’ love would mark them as unique among all people in the world and people would take notice. And that is why, loving one another with God’s, unconditional, holy love, is so important. It is the way that God wants to advertise the gospel to those whom we are called to share it with.

Part ll: Learning How To Apply Jesus’ Command In An Inter-generational Team

I thank God for the opportunity to learn some of these principles of living as a team of Jesus’ disciples, when I went on the eight day exploratory journey to Northern Ontario. The nuances of team building became very real to me. I discovered many things about myself and areas that I need to grow in. I want to share the things that I learned, as an older disciple, with you.

1. Realize that there is a generational gap.

To all you older Christians, you are not as “in the know” as you think you are. There have been advances in technology that I am not even aware of. The younger people had constant access to their smart phone. If we were having a conversation, it was a matter of seconds before the correct information was accessed on their phones. When a question came up they reacted quickly with the exact answer backed up by a web site. If directions were needed, the exact directions are summoned within seconds, by the young person. This can be very disconcerting, even threatening, to an older person, who is used to being the expert in knowledge among younger people.

There is also other media. In the truck we were sharing our music. I didn’t know I could hook my iPod up to the stereo system. To the young people, it seemed like second nature. It made the older person feel a little more out of the mix. I need to realize that the young people are more capable than someone twice their age in many areas. Be up on the latest technology. Young people will spend hours to try to find a connection. They will walk in a rain storm to find a connection. Respect that. They will be able to find any street in any town, anywhere on planet earth. They will be able to do things with car stereo or a smart phone that you would never dream could be done. What does this mean practically? Allow yourself to be humbled by their accuracy and quick answers. Just look, listen and learn. Determine to be on a continual, lifelong learning trajectory. Learn to be quiet…listen and learn and realize that you are in need to be taught by young people.

Ecclesiastes 3:1 reads, “For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven:” There are seasons even in your life in ministry. You may not think that you are on the way out…but you are. In one sense we are on the way out in a certain season in our lives, but entering another season. We tend to think that we will always be the leaders blazing the path. But we are being phased out of certain areas of ministry to become engaged in another. That is good news actually. Be aware of what season of life you are in and serve God accordingly. Beware of always remaining in the same season decade after decade. The more mature Christians may be able to offer things like advice, counseling, and wisdom, and serve in supportive functions, that comes from being twenty years or more ahead of others on the journey of life.

There is a certain season that you are in, that God wants to use you in a unique way.  People in the 70’s are now using their connections and relationships they have built over the years to introduce younger people to the mission field.  They are providing the expertise, the recommendations, the education, the cultural sensitivity training. The people in the 40’s to 60’s are forming the new networks. They are supporting the younger missionaries. They are opening up the roads to the mission field and in some cases holding out the vision and providing the support.

I know from my own family, the kids are learning from experiencing life with us. But they are more interested in their parents playing supportive roles and learning from their example. That could be a good way to think about how to mentor a new generation of missionaries. Borrowing an analogy from a friend’s description of Native ministry, mentoring could be like taking off in an airplane. The younger Christian is in the driver’s seat. They take off. They fly the plane and land it. The more mature Christian is in the passenger seat with his hand ready to take control in case of danger or an emergency and to give advice when asked. What do you think of this analogy? Is it appropriate in mentoring this new generation of missionaries?

Being aware of the generation gap, we need to make efforts to bridge that generation gap. Take time out to listen to other peoples’ music and appreciate it. The preferences you have are formed by your experiences. They grew up experiencing other things. They may not feel the same way about Eric Clapton or Keith Green as you do, nor should they. When we were riding we were listening to the Trews. (http://www.thetrewsmusic.com/) The younger people listened to a whole Eric Clapton album.  Be willing to let go of control of the music to the younger people. Don’t impose your preferences too much. Listen to others and respect them their choices. Give honor and deference to those whom God is raising up. And to be certain, that person will be younger than you are.

Don’t just groom a young person so they can be just like you to take your place of leadership in your idea of ministry. They do this in countries like Cuba. Let the young people be who they are. The world is different place than when you were a young Christian leader. The culture is changing. The younger Christian knows how to navigate the culture, without compromising the gospel, better than you can. They are coming onto the scene with a whole bunch of skills that the mission desperately needs. (That you can not even conjure up.)

Accept the fact that there will be different ways to live out a devotional life while on a team. I come from two decades of group, formal, morning, prayer meetings, singing out of a hymnal and praying from lists of prayer topics. My choice in doing devotionals is group oriented and formal. On the exploratory team I brought a hymnal with me. I was expecting to sing with others. But this was not the case. I discovered that young people are not into singing hymns together from a hymn book. And do you know what? That is OK. I need to be broad minded and accept all forms of personal devotion while living as a member of a team. I just took my hymn book, went to the edge of the forest and sang to God, the birds, the insects and the trees. It was very comforting.

Don’t become angry when faced with generational preferences being expressed. I have known a church dividing when the younger generation wanted to express their faith in a new way. The older generation became inflexible and even angry at the prospect of change. This turned off the young people. I think it is because the older peoples’ reaction robbed them of hope. The church lost 40% of their members because of the older generation’s lack of flexibility. In the words of the band REO Speedwagon, “turn the page and roll with the changes.”

2. Find God’s will

We must find the Missio Dei, for each of us, personally, and engage in it. God is growing his church and be content and patient with what God is doing in your life and you ministry. Don’t get ahead of the Spirit. Trust God and pray through each step of the next leg of your journey.

Don’t push your own personal goal and agenda. I mean, don’t project your own dreams for your ministry on others. Accept what God is doing in the hearts of the people who have been brought into your team. Accept what the people are offering. This is a very personal to me. I am a father of five and I was heading up a single family house church ministry for twelve years with my family members being the main players in ministry. I was projecting my own hopes for my ministry on them, with no concern about what God wanted for them. I cared very little about their personal calling. The end result of this venture was constant demands, judgment and criticism. It led to broken relationships with those close to me.
But God came to my rescue. A very wise, senior missionary lady gave me advice. When I was inquiring how to apply basic rules in my home, she told me to let go of my rules. She meant to be graceful, trust God and let people be free to follow the Lord as they have been called. I was so enmeshed in my old way of thinking that it literally took me two years to get out of it. At first I was losing all hope for ministry. But God helped me to stop projecting my hopes and dreams on others. On this last journey I could begin to understand God’s purpose in all of this. By his grace, I could become a more graceful mentor to younger Christians. I could be used by God to nurture what He is doing and not what I want to happen. I can let God be God and let people grow according to his grace. I still have a long way to go, but I praise Jesus for leading me on this path and using this exploratory journey to teach me why all of this was happening to me over the past two years.

3. Be a team supporter

Like I touched up in the previous section, maybe God has been preparing you, as an older Christian, to mentor and support young missionary teams with much prayer, grace, service and support. This is an excellent way to be team supporter. Listen to how Paul and his team supported the new believers in Thessalonica, “You are witnesses, and God also, how holy and righteous and blameless was our conduct toward you believers. ¹¹ For you know how, like a father with his children, ¹² we exhorted each one of you and encouraged you and charged you to walk in a manner worthy of God, who calls you into his own kingdom and glory.” 1 Thess 2:13-14. (ESV) Not that the other members of the team are children, for they are not, but the point is, older Christians are called to certain role within a team.

Older Christians can be good counselors. I saw the importance of this on trip. Young people want someone to talk to. They are searching for their calling. They want to know how and where to devote their energies. They want to bounce their ideas off of someone. They want feedback. Who doesn’t want all of these things? That is why they will benefit from older Christians to talk to. Older Christians need the confidence to be able to talk to the young people, meeting them where they are and helping then to talk through various issues. They must know they have something valuable to share and engage in conversation. After all God didn’t infuse 40 to 50 years of experience into your life for nothing. Share it with others.

If you can not counsel, then you have to make a supportive environment.  Set the example for others. Participate with your whole heart in worship, prayer, evangelism, outreach and giving. The young people are watching and learning from the older Christian.

Find your unique roll in the mission. The older Christian may not be called to go to an inaccessible region (or maybe they are), but they may be very effective in creating a home base for further operations. The years of experience will have made them better diplomats. They may be very effective in networking with area Christians and churches. I could see this as my role as an older Christian.

The older Christian may be used to be a visionary, planting that vision in other peoples’ hearts. Act 2:17-18 read, “And in the last days it shall be, God declares, that I will pour out my Spirit on all flesh, and your sons and your daughters shall prophesy, and your young men shall see visions, and your old men shall dream dreams; ¹⁸ even on my male servantsand female servants in those days I will pour out my Spirit, and they shall prophesy.” We can see these verses working out among the members of our team. God’s spirit is being poured out on all. The young members of our team are full of vision to see the Gospel expand to remote places in Northern Canada. The older members of the team also have visions to see a vast network formed and a mission’s movement formed among the members of the local churches. Both groups want the word of God preached to the people of this present generation.

As we follow the Missio Dei, we may frequently ask ourselves, “What next?” The older person may be the one to present informed options and direction as to where to turn next. They have the experience.

4. Serve others

The older Christian has a great opportunity to serve others on the team, learning of Christ. Luke 22:25-27 reads, “And he said to them, “The kings of the Gentiles exercise lordship over them, and those in authority over them are called benefactors. ²⁶ But not so with you. Rather, let the greatest among you become as the youngest, and the leader as one who serves. ²⁷ For who is the greater, one who reclines at table or one who serves? Is it not the one who reclines at table? But I am among you as the one who serves.” (ESV) It is easy for the older Christian to expect to be served while on a team. After all, they have spent decades being served by their spouses, children and possibly even the church. After a while, serving may not come naturally. They may even feel that serving in certain ways may be beneath them. But Jesus says that the greatest among us is the one who serves, no matter what the age. Being on a team is an excellent opportunity for the older Christian to serve the younger members of the team. One should be ready to serve, taking up the humble role. Here are some examples I learned to serve on our team: make the hotel room a home away from home. Make the whole experience as comfortable as possible. Wash the dishes without being asked. (even the pan nobody wants to touch.) Clean the grill. Cook a meal.  Offer to buy coffee or a doughnut for someone. Pray with other team members. Provide counseling or a listening ear. Carry some bags. There are countless ways to serve others in Jesus’ name.

5. Be ready to sacrifice

John 15:12-13 reads, “This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. ¹³ Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends.” Laying down your life for your friends involves denying yourself. There are ample opportunities to practice this while on a team. I am the kind of person that easily goes into sensory overload. When I do, I want to shut down and retreat to a quiet place to recoup. When I am networking with other people, sometimes I feel like I cannot engage in another conversation or visit another person. But that may not be possible on a team. Sometimes I didn’t feel like going to visit another person. I just wanted to do back to my hotel room and rest. But I learned that one way I could lay down my life is to remain engaged when necessary, going that extra mile. What about denying your own ideas and opinion and plans?

Give of your money. It is going to cost you to engage in mission with a team. There is not only providing for your needs, like housing, food and transportation, there are also costs like paying for dinner with someone you hope to network with. When one person is going to pay for the meal, God may be moving your heart to contribute to covering the cost. On one visit, $40 was given to the coffee fund of people whom we visited. There are offerings at the churches we visit. You will need a lot of money. The older Christian usually has more resources and income. The younger members are trying to raise support. Stinginess is not conducive to being an older member on a Gospel mission. Be willing to sacrifice. Give it up older Christians!

6. Think about the needs of other members in the team.

There are intergenerational needs.  If you are older you need to consider yourself like an older brother or sister on the team.  With this in mind, try to relate and talk, engaging individuals in conversation.  Pray for others. Don’t be isolated or individualistic. After all you are part of a team and the greater Christian family.

Keep your shared living space clean. You are not living by yourself. You are living temporarily with someone you barely know. Think about that.

As an older Christian, consider your snoring. If you are older and little over weight the chances are you snore and the other younger people do not. Tell the other person, “It is ok to hit me with a pillow if I snore.”

Be mindful of others family relations. If you are driving by the town of a team member ask them if they want to visit their family member. Take a little time out to think about their social needs.

7. Encourage one another in a spiritual relationship

Team members could encourage one another spiritually. 1 Thessalonians 5:10-11, “who died for us so that whether we are awake or asleep we might live with him. ¹¹ Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.” and Hebrews 10:24-25, “And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, ²⁵ not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near.” (ESV)

A team is a perfect place to encourage one another. We were in close proximity for eight days. Matt, my roommate, prayed together for several nights. We could encourage one another by setting the example for others. Set the example in prayer, in worship and in participation. Get into discussions. Get into the group. An older Christian may provide printed learning material, but don’t push it on others. Develop it and present it and allow people to digest it as they desire.

8. Build honest and sincere relationships

If there is one thing that younger Christians want are open and honest relationships. Older people don’t want to share their struggles with younger people. But especially in regards to a team, they need to.  Share about your personal struggles. Be real. People appreciate authenticity. They may even identify with you in your struggles and your struggles may help to show them the way.  After all you are 20 years plus ahead of them on their journey. I was blessed when one girl asked my “Story” while were eating. It was a way that I could share my life testimony on how I met Jesus. I could also share my feelings. When I felt like “shutting down” I told others how I feel. I think they appreciated that.

Don’t always be so serious. I believe Jesus laughed a lot. Laughing is from God. Laughing is good for you in so many ways. On the team we had a lot of good laughs. We shared about some awkward experiences in ministry. We laughed about mosquitoes. We confessed what was on our I-pods. There were times when we laughed until we were in tears. As an older person on a team, show your humorous side. Cut a few jokes. If you don’t know any equip yourself with an internet search. A little humor goes a long way.

Sometimes we feel awkward communicating. But my advice is keep communicating. God will help you to relate.

9. Control your sinful nature

When we are on a Christian mission, there is always a spiritual battle going on. 1 Peter 5:8 reads, “Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.” (ESV) Every team has a prayer and goal to reveal Jesus and to proclaim the kingdom of God. But be aware that there are spiritual forces that want nothing more than to destroy the fledgling work that God has begun to grow through your team. Paul says it well when he states in Ephesians 6:12, “For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places. ^“ (ESV)  We need to always be aware where the battle is being fought. The schemes of the devil almost always occur in the battleground of our own hearts and minds. The arena can be within the interpersonal relationships of our own team members. But there are some ways to thwart the devil’s schemes.

Some ways are revealed in Ephesians 6:10-13 which read, “Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of his might. ¹¹ Put on the whole armor of God that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil. ¹² For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places. ¹³ Therefore take up the whole armor of God that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand firm.”(ESV)

First, Ephesians 6:10 reads, “Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of his might.” This battle is between powerful spiritual forces. We can never stand our ground without depending in God. We must know the fragility of what you are trying to accomplish through our team. For example, harboring negative emotions like, pride can bring everything down. One moment of expressed anger can ruin decades of future co-working. These are things that we find hard to control and may well up in a moment’s notice. Paul exhorts the Ephesians to be strong in the Lord and the strength of his might. Our God is the Almighty Creator of the heavens and the earth. He is alive and active in his creation. He has a deep concern for his people and listens attentively for their prayers. He is ready, willing and able to help us be spiritually strong. It is his might working in us. May we always depend on the Lord.

Second, we must put on the full armor of God. Look at verse 11, “Put on the whole armor of God that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil.” It would require a whole other article to describe each piece of the armor. But the point I would like to make here is that God provides pieces of spiritual armor that are effective in protecting us from forces of evil. They are put on through faith. The armor that God prescribes is complete and we must don the whole outfit. Again, we must depend on God and what the Lord has provided.

Third, “Having done all”. Look at verse 13, “Therefore take up the whole armor of God that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand firm.”  Knowing that God is there to defend us and knowing that the armor he provides is all sufficient in defending us against the devil’s schemes, does not excuse us from engaging ourselves in the spiritual battle. Verses 13b, “…and having done all, to stand firm.”  God does not just want us to lay there like dead fish floating downstream. He wants his people to be like living fish, swimming upstream. We can stand by engaging our faith. This involves many things, but some basics are prayer, which should be like breathing for us, studying the word and putting it into practice, reversing the trend towards isolation by building relationships, loving and serving one another in Christ’s name, trusting in God, seeking his wisdom and so on and so on. We should not do these things sluggishly or casually, but “Having done all”.  Apply your God given passion.

Fourth, be strengthened in the grace of God. Read Paul’s advice to Timothy in 2 Timothy 2:1-3, “You then, my child, be strengthened by the grace that is in Christ Jesus, ² and what you have heard from me in the presence of many witnesses entrust to faithful menwho will be able to teach others also. ³ Share in suffering as a good soldier of Christ Jesus.” (ESV) Be strengthened in the grace that is in Christ Jesus. We must take deep root in the grace of Jesus. What has Jesus done for each of us? He has granted us the complete forgiveness of sins. He has brought us into his kingdom and with it, eternal life. He is guiding us along the most blessed, fruitful path as we are passing through this world. He floods our hearts with, love, hope, truth, revelation and meaning. He brings convergence in our lives. And this is just the tip of the iceberg! God is good. Knowing the gifts that have literally been poured out on us, though we are undeserving, is pure grace. Being able to be part of an intergenerational team is pure grace. Knowing what we have been saved from, were it not for the grace of God, and being filled with thanksgiving, is part of being strong in the grace of God is all about. This is one way to stand against the devil’s schemes.

When we are on a Christian mission with others we must know ourselves and our sinful tendencies. Know that you have a tendency to be judgmental, competitive, and attention seeking. Here are a few of my spiritual weaknesses that I discovered in myself as I participated on a Christian team.

Don’t compete. I wanted to compete with others in my heart. Don’t do this. Those with 20, 30 or 40 more years more experience with the gospel may be more skilled and have more experience, but you must know that you are not the future of the mission, the younger person is. Anyone with a PhD knows that the more they learn the more aware they are of what they don’t know. Greater learning should make one more humble and dependent on Christ. The younger person’s passion and exuberance, along with their vision and ability to navigate the culture will trump your experience. God will move in the hearts of those we are called to minister to better than you can ever do. For example, I have heard it said that the average age of people in First Nation’s communities is fifteen.  Who are they going to relate to better, the 40-60 year old Christian or the 25 year old Christian couple? The answer is obvious.

Don’t envy. The young person may be more formally trained. They may be getting more attention from the other leaders (for they are the hope of the future), but don’t envy. The older Christian’s role is very important. It most likely will be a “behind the scenes” supportive role. But it is vitally important. Even if you don’t receive the recognition that you think you deserve, you are appreciated and are helping to lay the foundation for future missions. You may be in a different season of life. God wants to use you in different ways. Accept that. Don’t be envious of others whom God is using in different ways. They are in another season of life. They have another calling. Don’t reminisce about the past. Be content with how God is using you now and wants to use you in the future.

Don’t project your own hopes and dreams on others. Here is a big one that has tainted relationships for me in the past. Don’t push your own goal and your own agenda on the younger believer. Accept what God is doing and what people are offering. If you have your own goal and time table, you may find yourself pushing people with unreal expectations and even becoming angry, judgment and disappointed with other people on a daily basis. The younger person will sense this and become resentful or feel pushed into doing something that is not actually from God. They may do things to simply to please the older Christian. That will never be a lasting work of God. It is artificial. You may be projecting your own goals even while losing touch with the culture that is developing around you. Remain humble and keep in step with the Spirit.

Trust God’s Timing, and not ours. Jesus likened the Kingdom of God to a mustard seed. Matthew 13:31-32 reads, “…The kingdom of heaven is like a mustard seed, which a man took and planted in his field. ³² Though it is the smallest of all seeds, yet when it grows, it is the largest of garden plants and becomes a tree, so that the birds come and perch in its branches.” (NIV) When a farmer plants the seed, he plants in faith. He knows that the seed has such great potential. He trusts God, that when he plants the seed and waters it, it will produce a crop. But time is needed. “When you sow, you do not plant the body that will be, but just a seed, perhaps of wheat or of something else. ³⁸ But God gives it a body as he has determined, and to each kind of seed he gives its own body.” (1 Cor 15:37) God gives the seed a body as he has determined. It happens in his way and in his time. A few seeds have been planted. Now God is making it grow. We need to just pray and wait in the Lord to unfold things as he has determined. Now is the time to enjoy watching the seeds that were planted as they bear fruit. That is the attitude we must have in regards to our approach to being a member of a Christian team. We must be patient with what God is doing on the mission field and also in peoples’ hearts, especially in the hearts of each team member. Always remember the words of Paul, “And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.” (ESV; Php 1:6)

Conclusion:

In conclusion, I want to refer once again to our key verse John 13:34,35, “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. ³⁵ By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.” (ESV)  On a Christian mission we are all part of a team. We are disciples of Jesus called to proclaim the kingdom of God together. The best way to do this is to love one another. If we love one another with Christ’s love, then we can have unity and as we serve the mission, the whole world will know that we are disciples of Jesus. We can present the Gospel with a united front and the world will listen. Coming into close proximity, in a Christian team, makes loving one another more difficult. Having people from differing generations adds to that difficulty. But when we come together with faith in our hearts and with a desire to glorify Jesus, God will help us love one another and glorify the name of Jesus together.