ubfriends is changing

bChange is coming!

Meanwhile, enjoy this first comment from Ben (which is the 2nd comment ever on ubfriends!)

Ben Toh (2010-06-25 16:17:39)
“Hi Joe, You Be Friends is cute”

If you have ideas for the what and how and why of ubfriends, please let us know!  Thank you and have a burden-free weekend!

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Steven Hassan Interview

ScreenShot2015-03-20at9.38.57AMPlease watch this.

Steven Hassan and Brian Karcher discuss various topics from Steven’s book “Combating Cult Mind Control” and Brian’s book “Identity Snatchers”.


Steven A. Hassan, M.Ed., LMHC, NCC is a former cult member who has been educating the public about mind control and destructive cults since 1976. As a Nationally Certified Counselor (NCC) and Licensed Mental Health Counselor (LMHC), Hassan is the author three books that have received extensive praise from former cult members, families of former members, clergy, cult experts, and psychologists. Combating Cult Mind Control: The #1 Best Selling Guide to Protection, Rescue, and Recovery from Destructive Cults(1988, 1990, 2015), Releasing the Bonds: Empowering People to Think for Themselves(2000), and Freedom of Mind: Helping Loved Ones Leave Controlling People, Cults & Beliefs, (2012, 2013). He also co-developed “Ending the Game”, a non-coercive curriculum designed to educate and empower commercial sex trafficking victims.

He has appeared on 60 Minutes, CNN, NPR, Good Morning America, The Today Show, Larry King Live, Oprah, Dr. Drew, Dr. Phil, and many other programs, and has been featured in People Magazine, USA Today, Newsweek, The New York Times, The Washington Post, The Wall Street Journal, Chicago Tribune, The Guardian, and dozens of other major publications and websites. Learn more about him and the Freedom of Mind Resource Center, Inc. at FreedomOfMind.com

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I’m Praying For You

The words haunt me. Ever since my name showed up on the Sundapy announcements as someone “struggling and in need of prayers”, the words are a shower of bitterness to me. I realized this week such feelings are valid because “praying for you to change” is not a healthy prayer and has little if anything to do with Christ. How do you know the way I should act or think or feel or change? After MJ’s articles this week about right being wrong and overcoming the “I’m sorry syndrome”, I stumbled across a rather striking contradiction: When can prayer be wrong?

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Book Review: Combating Cult Mind Control

hassanIn 1990, Steven Hassan courageously published the book, Combating Cult Mind Control: The #1 Best Selling Guide To Protection, Rescue, and Recovery from Destructive Cults. Now, 25 years later, Hassan has published an updated edition. Here is my book review, and brief introduction to Steven Hassan.

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Why Trump and Evangelicals Go Together

trumpYesterday I got some exercise by walking 4 miles around Las Vegas. On the way back I saw one of the buildings in Donald Trump’s hotel empire. It dawned on me then why Trump has garnered support among the religious right-wing Evangelicals. This match seems so crazy at first. But it is not so crazy. Here are three reasons why I think the Trump-religious right match makes sense–painful, obvious sense.

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Let 100 Flowers Blossom

sThis week I had the privilege to listen to Guy Kawasaki speak. It is refreshing to learn from an actual world-class leader. Guy is “one of the Apple employees originally responsible for marketing the Macintosh in 1984. He popularized the word evangelist in marketing the Macintosh and the concepts of evangelism marketing and technology evangelism.” One of his excellent points is this: Let 100 flowers blossom.

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Identity Snatchers


Over a year ago, I wrote a provocative article here on ubfriends, entitled Shepherd Brian is Dead. It is an unfortunate reality that in order to have any kind of conversation with UBF members, I need to use such rhetoric. Dropping the C-bomb (as Joe likes to call it) is the only way I have found that leads to some honest, real answers about the UBF ministry. In my article last year, I wrote this:

“Why do I claim University Bible Fellowship is a cult? The answer is because ubf shepherds and missionaries are identity snatchers. They spiritually abused me and thousands others by stealing our identity and persuading us to adopt their identity. That identity was called “Shepherd Brian”. But that is not who I am. That was never who I was. That is not my authentic self.”

That comment about identity snatching stuck with me. It has now lead to my new book.

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The Ubferator!

nHey everyone, we just topped 19,000 comments! The conversations have been rather heavy lately, so I thought we could all use a good laugh. I am in tears from laughing so hard at this! Check it out.

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Back to School

stYesterday we sent off our second daughter to college. Wow, time flies so fast! My wife and I are so thankful there is no ubf chapter there :) To celebrate this back to school season, I have three gifts for you!

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Are you in a Christian ministry?

chBefore we publish MJ’s excellent new article, I want to share a few mid-week thoughts. Ben’s recent comment about being HOT (honest, open and transparent) prompted me to come up with a top 10 list, Letterman style, to find out if your ubf chapter is a Christian ministry or not. Can you be HOT at your ubf chapter? These 10 statements are normal and healthy. Even a really messed up Christian church would have little concern over these statements. What does your ubf shepherd say about these things? Can you share some of these things every Friday in your testimony (or reflection, sogam, whatever they call it now)?

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